If They Only Knew
by njgscn
Summary: Sometimes when we're in love we do things we don’t understand. We push ourselves and we find that we're doing more than what we're capable of. Read through the story of how Rose and Scorpius contemplate on the love they've hidden for 7 years
1. Un

**Disclaimer: **All rights belong to JK Rowling.

* * *

_No one should ask themselves that: Why am I unhappy?  
The question carries within it the virus that will destroy everything.  
If we ask that question, it means we want to find out what makes us happy.  
If what makes us happy is different from what we have now,  
then we must either change once and for all or stay as we are,  
feeling even more unhappy._

_- The Zahir_

**

* * *

November 1, 2024 **

Love, reliance, life. Life happens. Frustration, vulnerability, tears, more tears. Possible hatred? Acceptance? No, that's the hardest part.

It's a vicious cycle and everyone's trapped in it.

I look around and I see trees swaying back and fort. Casting my eye downwards, I find myself staring at the grass that linger beneath my fingers. I brush the grass with my fingers and lift my gaze up to watch the lake, it's calm and if it was visible in human form, I'd envy it. I feel the wind brush through my face and it's supposed to make me feel calm, shouldn't it? Wind sure does that to most people. I feel cold and I like it. I mean, physical pain should overcome emotional pain. Right? You'd rather get hit by the Whomping Willow than go through _this_. My hands quiver and my heart uncontrollably hammers, pounds so hard like it wants to break through the sternum and out of my chest. I close my eyes and I'm brought to a flashback of yesterday. The sun rises and it starts to brighten the entire field. Looking around, I suddenly realize why they call this _morning_.

I can hear someone scream my name from behind. The image of him suddenly flashes in my mind and I wonder if it's him. I don't look back but I can hear the person rushing closer.

"Rose!"

I felt my heart sink.

It's not _him._

"Are you out of your mind? It's freezing out here and you don't even have your cloak on."

I stand and straighten my skirt and turn around to face my cousin. He's got this look I've come to know so well, concern.

"Albus," is all I manage to say.

He heaves a sigh and mutters, "we should get you inside, you look like you could get something to eat."

I'm not really hungry but decide that it is _way_ too early to argue with my cousin. Instead, I offer to walk back to the castle. He doesn't speak, he doesn't ask and somewhere between his sneering and scowling (which is his way of showing disappointment) we managed to safely get inside the Great Hall. I automatically glance at the Slytherin table and the first person, the insane part of me, that is, wants to see isn't there. I mean, I just got through a _horrific_ break up. The last person I need to see is him.

Albus tugs my arm as he notices where and what I'm staring at. I look at him and his expression is calm. Okay, this is just unfair. How come everyone but me can look so calm effortlessly? He opens his mouth and is about to say something but hesitates. He looks like he's having a mini argument with himself whether it would do me good or bad to hear what he is about to say.

"Just say it Al," I wait.

"You should still sit with us," he continues, "you know Scorpius, he'll figure when something's up."

I roll my eyes and mutter, "No shit Al, we practically live together."

"I don't know how you do it" he creases his brow utterly confused, "I mean seven years and he's—"

I cut him off before he starts filling me up with details part of me probably already knows. "I appreciate the concern Al, but I think I'm going to sit with Louis now".

He looked at me with a discerning expression. "You know you have to end up telling him _someday_."

"No I don't," I whisper, "I shouldn't have told you."

With that said I leave Albus and hurried towards the Ravenclaw table. I already see Louis' stand out red hair which looks slightly lighter than mine and managed to quicken my pace. He must have heard my footsteps coming since he kindly moves to leave a space for me to sit beside him. I look at my cousin and he's smiling, his blue eyes looking as genuine as ever. No wonder almost the entire female population in Hogwarts go gaga over him. He has the tendency to charm his way into your senses with one look. Too bad he's taken and not to mention very faithful. Everyone practically melts at the sight of Louis Weasley, _well_, except for me of course and probably Haley, since she should probably be used to it by now.

"I'm glad you decided to sit with me today," he speaks up, "I was starting to believe that you forgot about your good-looking best friend". Can I rewind that? Quote on quote "bestfriend" slash only present when Haley's MIA. I mentally smile at myself. Who knew Muggle abbreviations could actually humor me?

When I look at Louis, I manage to let a short giggle and smile. I sigh at the thought of my lips still capable of forming the said expression. I automatically glance, once again at the Slytherin table. Part of me is hoping that he's not there so I wouldn't have to look every now and then, but the better or should I say again, _insane_ part of me wants him to be there. I catch a glimpse of Albus and Felix Zabini. They were talking apprehensively with each other until someone interrupted their—from the looks of it—meaningful conversation.

It's _him_.

The core reason why I'm trapped in this vicious cycle.

The reason why I've been trapped for the past, _oh I don't _know, seven years?

It's him.

Scorpius Malfoy. _Scorpius_ bloody _Malfoy_.

I stare and I cannot find the strength to look away. I stare at the way his blonde hair looks a little untidy and the way his Slytherin robe just flows and fits with his body naturally, like it always does. He looks like those male models you see in Muggle magazines dressed up in uniforms. You know that they aren't actually the ones who wear the uniforms but are chosen to advertise them because of their looks. I look at his pale face, showing no sign of emotion whatsoever. Even though I'm already used to seeing his face always wearing the same emotionless expression, I still stare. I stare and stare. I bloody stare like I always do. Stare and stare until he looks up and catches me staring at him. I try to look away, but I can't. Those grey eyes which I'm currently staring at won't let me. He holds my gaze and doesn't let it go. He holds my gaze and doesn't let it go. He holds my bloody gaze and doesn't let go.

"Rose," at the sound of Louis' voice I flinch, "you haven't touched your food yet. You should at least eat."

I don't even bother to look at my food. I've lost my appetite and all the willingness to eat has been sucked out of me. I tell Louis that I'm not hungry and I should just go. I have to go because I feel those certain grey eyes staring at me, staring me hard. He knows that I'm aware of his staring and doesn't bother to look away. I don't have to look at him to see if I'm correct. I have developed this instinct which only applies to him, for the past seven years. I have to leave before pain starts to hit me again. I have to leave before the pain gets worse. I compose myself together, ready to leave. But before I stand Louis swiftly grabs my right wrist.

"We have Potions in five minutes, you'll be late if you go anywhere else." He insists, convincing me to stay, "and no one wants Head Girl skipping a class."

Head girl arriving late for one bloody class, big deal. I look at Louis and he has that you-know-I'm-right look. My mind almost gives in but my heart doesn't. My heart wants to get the hell out of here and run for it. Run until I can feel the calmness I've been imploring for. I tell Louis that I'll be there on time. I wait until he finally lets go of my wrist, slightly convinced that I'm not planning on cutting potions. At this, I break free and run and I can hear people watching me from behind and I don't look back, I just run. I run along the corridors and jump my way up the moving staircases. I run to the left side into the hallways. I run, as fast as I can until I see the narrowed staircase heading up the Astronomy Tower. I race up and each step I take feels endless. After what seemed like forever, I'm finally able to breathe meticulously. I walk up to the balcony and let the wind brush through every single sensory motor I have on my skin. I feel the wind, and I feel its calmness and I envy its calmness.

I hear footsteps coming and suddenly—

"Rose,"

I close my eyes and breathe, heart sinking. Inhale, exhale, inhale and exhale. I turn around and try to pull off a convincing smile.

"Scorpius!" I act surprised.

He remains silent and I think about what I should say.

"You're not planning on skipping class are you? Head boys should set students a good example."

He rolls his eyes and plants that smirk I've come to love so much.

"Head boy doesn't give shit about those students," his smirk widens, "head boy sees that his fellow head girl is sad and wants to know why."

I look at him and heave a sigh, wait for that brave moment to come until I spill everything out—_well, not exactly everything._

"I.. I have been thinking about Miles and Bryan and I feel like there's this alarm in their heads that goes on whenever they're with me."

I look at him.

"I don't even know what made me go out with them. I mean, Miles, well," I pause for a moment. How do I even begin with Miles? And to mention he's in Ravenclaw with me. And Bryan, he was in Slytherin and he was sweet. But, the thing is, they both didn't work out for the same reason. "They all seem to think that I never loved them or was never really in love with them in the first place." I sigh, "I've been a faithful girlfriend don't you think?"

He smiles and averts his gaze. He seems to be thinking what to say next. Contemplating if what he wants to say is right or—

"Just say it Scorp," I interrupt his train of thoughts. Sometimes he and Albus can be so much alike, thinking through every detail before they eventually speak up.

"Did you? Love them?" he asks uncertain. And maybe I'm just hallucinating, or living in my own imaginary euphoria, but I could have sworn there was something about his eyes when he asked that.

_Oh, I don't know. _I don't answer. I mean, can't someone just flash it? Unless he's probably reading my mind right now. But why Rose? Why? No matter how hard I tried to rebuff and run away, it always seemed to haunt me. It even appalls me how you can love someone so much and keep it a secret from yourself and the rest of the world_.  
_

The answer's so evident I don't even want to say it. Of course I don't. You want to know why? Because of _you_. Wasn't it always you for seven bloody years?_  
_

He looks back at me. I silently beg that he won't run away again. I silently beg for him to just stay here.

He holds my gaze and we stare at each other. Piercing gray and pale blue sheltered and burdened.

_If you only knew._

* * *

**R&R!**


	2. Deux

**Disclaimer:** All rights belong to JK Rowling

* * *

**February 11, 2019**

"WEASLEY!"

Startled, I quickly turn back and come face to face with no other than Scorpius Malfoy. His eyes are wide, his brows are creased and he's wearing an extremely distasteful frown. Oh Merlin, he's angry. He's definitely angry. I'd hate to admit it but I'm probably the reason behind his rage.

"Malfoy, do you not have an inside voice?" I state nonchalantly, "I am not suffering from any hearing impairment and I am fully capa—"

"Shut up Weasley," he groans, "You completely messed up our potions assignment!"

"Oh I'm sorry, it completely slipped off my mind since it happened just this morning." I added sarcastically.

"You know, next time, I'm considering to _Crucio_ the professor mindless enough to partner me with you."

"Good luck with that Malfoy," I roll my eyes, "never heard of a first year using an unforgivable curse before fully mastering it. But then again, I could use a laugh."

"I'd _Crucio_ you right now if I wanted to." He grimaces.

Okay freeze. Did I mention how arrogant Scorpius Malfoy is? And the fact that he's bestfr—

"Hey mate, wait up" Albus looks at me and smile, "hey Rose"

Speaking of which.

"Al, your best friend here was just telling me how he'd be willing to—"

"_Crucio_ you and a professor?" he interrupts.

I display a shocking disbelief at what _my _cousin just said and how he knew about it. I hear Scorpius scowl and look to see that he's now wearing that despising smirk on his face. _How I hate that smirk. _If I had an iron I'd be more than willing to flatten that nerve-wrecking expression. When it's completely flat and uncontrollably burning I'd splash his face with 100°C lava and savor my buttery popcorn while I engross myself with the most pleasant scene in front of me. It sounds impractical even to myself, but then again, a girl can dream can't she. I grin at my brief ecstasy and avert my gaze from the ceiling and give Albus "The Rose Glare".

"Relax Rose, I overheard" Albus chuckles, "and you guys need to quit bickering over nonsense. One of these days you might end up _Crucio-ing_ each other instead."

Oh, what on earth. This is one of _these_ days; didn't he just hear his best friend earlier?

"I'd really love that." I sneer before turning around to walk away.

As I make my way towards the transfiguration room, I notice that everyone I seem to pass by, starts to back away. I scowl. Do I have something on my face now? Or do I smell? I did take a decent shower. Deciding I don't give a shit I continue to walk through the corridors. I spot Louis and heave a sigh of relief. If there's one person that can turn this dreadful day upside down, it would definitely be Louis.

He sees me approaching and suddenly backs away a bit. Oh great, _just what I needed._

"Woah Rose, you look like you're set ready to kill."

He starts walking closer, "let me guess, Malfoy?"

I scorn at his remark and realize that if we don't start walking we're going to be late for Transfigurations.

"We should go Louis, I don't want to be late for Transfigurations." I sigh.

As we made our way towards Transfigurations class, I recount to Louis what happened earlier after potions. I tell him that he should have been there so I could have begged Professor Slughorn to have him as my partner. He debates that either way Professor Slughorn would still partner me up with Malfoy since we are his favorites. Despite my unpleasant mood, I somehow triumph at his reply. I mean, first year in Hogwarts and I'm already a favorite. _Oh yeah._

We manage to get to class in time. I find a spot for both me and Louis to sit on. We start talking about Valentine's Day, which is in three days. To my surprise Louis already has a date. He motions over to a girl sitting two rows ahead from the seat to our left, Haley Brown, a Gryffindor. I look at Haley and notice that she greatly resembles her mother, except for the blonde hair. I remember mum telling me how jealous she was when dad started dating Lavender Brown. I look back at Louis and somehow, I conclude that they would look cute together. Even though I've never seen such pair, a red-hair and a blonde? Well, there's no law in the rule book that says otherwise.

"She's really great. I've been eyeing her for quite a while now and yesterday, I got her alone in the corridor and well," he smiles, "I decided that it was then or never."

I smile back at my cousin.

"How about you Rose, has anyone dared to ask you out yet?" he sounded teasingly.

No. As a matter of fact, we're too young. I then lightly punch his forearm. "Oh come on, am I that daunting?"

"Don't get me wrong Rose, you're cute, funny, and not to mention terribly smart, but you tend to make guys nervous." He sighs, "I mean the only guy brave enough to talk to you, aside from family of course, is probably Malfoy."

I'd hate to admit it but Louis is probably right. Every male in my family says I have this aura that makes anyone I argue with piss in his pants. I mean, I'm not a bitch and I sure can handle my temper... I just, well I guess, I tend to always bluntly utter my opinions. And when it comes to Malfoy, let's just say he knows where to push the buttons. Why and how, is a major vagueness.

I look at Louis and sigh.

_If I only knew._

* * *

**Terribly short, I apologize. **

**A review would be great! x  
**


	3. Trois

I noticed that the years might get you confused and all. Just subtract it from the year in ch.1 so you have an idea.

**Disclaimer:** All rights go to JK Rowling

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**February 12, 2019**

I'm late.

I knew it. I should have asked mum for the time turner. If I don't get to bloody Defense against the Dark Arts in a couple of minutes, _oh I don't even want to think about it._

How could I have missed the time? I was too engrossed in reading _The Great Gatsby _by some Muggle by the name _Fitzgerald_. My mum gave it to me for Christmas last year. Who knew Muggles were as chaotic as to achieve World War I _and_ World War II. And here I was, thinking we wizards caused the most havoc.

Louis didn't even bother to wait for me either. As I hurry my way along the corridors, I notice that I'm actually the only one present, except for a few seventh years. They got all the free time in the world. I frown at the thought. How I wish I wa—

"Watch it Weasley!" How. I. Wish. I was not bumping into _Scorpius Malfoy_.

I look at the mischievous sprite I accidentally collided with. From the looks of it, he's also running late. I pause for a while and become aware that his hair quite resembles Albus—uncombed and scruffy, but thinner. His eyes, piercing grey. His nose along with the rest of his facial features are quite symmetrical. If I didn't think so myself, this boy was probably revived from a carved statue. He raises his right eyebrow and I come to the realization that I have been staring for a brief moment there.

He smirks.

Oh, _bloody hell._

Let me tell you, the world loves me.

I grasp.

"Malfoy, we're late!"

He seems to grasp it as well and grabs my arm while I trail behind him. I could have asked the reason since I'm fully capable of walking on my own but my mind is shifting to the consequences our tardiness might bring. When we manage to enter the classroom, the inevitable happens. Professor Harth, was looking at us like he was expecting our arrival.

"Ms. Weasley, Mr. Malfoy," he speaks, "since you are both late obviously aware of our activity today, I can't help but to think that your unpunctuality was intentional."

"Professor! I—" we both barge in at the same time.

He continues, "did you two think that if either one of you came in late, that I would not have to partner you up with each other? Your skills match and I am undoubtedly sure that only the two of you can handle each other."

He motions us to find a seat and to my distress, the only two vacant ones are right beside each other. I sigh. We might as well sit with together if we're going to be partners. During the lesson, neither of us speak at each other as Professor Harth demonstrates defensive spells. I take a glimpse at Malfoy and notice that he's mimicking the way Professor Harth handles his wand for each spell._ Oh, _I see. No wonder he's so good at Defense against the Dark Arts, he pays attention to every detail Professor Harth says or does. I'm bemusedly awed by it and for a moment I forget about everything else and stare at the way Malfoy mimics Professor Harth.

* * *

"Rose, wait up!"

As I leave the room to look for Louis, who evidently forgot about me again, I turn around to face my other cousin.

"Hey Al, what's up?"

"Scorpius reckons you two should start practicing." He quickly conveys.

"Al, he's got two feet and a rude mouth perfectly capable of uttering words. Why don't he just tell me so himself?" I ask out of curiosity. _Well_, not really.

"He wasn't in the mood, you know Scorp," _Scorp? _He calls him _Scorp?_ "plus you tend to get ticked off whenever he speaks to you."

That's because he irritatingly knows where to drop the bombs at the right places. I look at my cousin and he seems to be waiting for a response. Fine. I sigh and tell him to tell Malfoy to meet me up the Astronomy Tower tomorrow morning. He seems to have missed what I said so I repeat. I notice however that he's somewhat staring somewhere behind me, and not at me.

"Albus?" I nudge him. "Earth to Albus Potter?" I wave my hands in front of his face.

He flinches at my voice and manages to clear his throat. "Sorry Rose. What was it you were saying?"

"What were you staring at?" I smirk and I turn around to find that _what_ was actually a _who._ I spot two girls talking animatedly to each other. One's a blonde Gryffindor with big bright eyes, who I've come to know as Haley Brown, the girl Louis asked for Valentines. I recognize the other one with raven hair as a fellow Ravenclaw of mine whose name I seem to have forgotten.

I turn to Albus and notice that he's staring particularly at her.

"Who's that?" I mock teasingly.

"Cindy Chang," he abruptly states. "She's in Ravenclaw, how can you not know her?" Yeah, how can I not?

I snicker, "I don't have a memory the size of Hogwarts Al, and I bet you right now you can't name every single guy in Slytherin." He rolls his eyes.

"Hey mate!"

_Speaking_ of Slytherins, here comes the tandem. Oh Hay to Felix Zabini and Scorpius Malfoy! They are pacing towards our direction. _Great_, I'm about to be outnumbered by the new Hogwarts trio. A red-hair against one pale, one tanned, and a _blonde._ A challenging variety I must say. Though it's quite a laugh if you picture it. The thing is, it doesn't really bother me much except for the fact that Albus and Felix seem to turn either mute whenever I'm present or start mocking me and to top it all there's only the three of them. I turn to look at trio and notice that Felix just nudged Albus.

"You're staring again mate," he states as-a-matter-of-fact. "Why don't you just ask her out for Valentine's?" Oh, so that's what it was all about.

Albus shakes his head, "too soon mate."

"Of course not," Malfoy pipes, "you should piss her off or something and you'll get her attention right away."

Trust Malfoy to come up with something like that.

I roll my eyes at his remark, "don't listen to him Al, if you piss her off she'll get the impression that you're a yanking prude, an annoying git or a reckless punk."

"Punk?" the three of them ask in chorus.

I laugh ominously, "how can you not know a simple Muggle word?" I mean, every Muggle I've watched on that big flat object they call _television_ practically says the word.

"Whatever that is Weasley, at least she'll notice him," Malfoy protests, "and that's a start."

"Yes Malfoy, he'll want her to notice him for the wrong reasons."

He sneers.

I glare.

It's an intense moment and I can feel another fury rising. He was about to argue until both Felix and Albus interrupt with an intentional cough.

"Now, now, you guys don't want to be fighting," he persuades, "after all you both are going to frequently spend time with each other from now on."

Thinking of what Felix was referring to, I suddenly remember about our practice meeting for tomorrow morning. Malfoy seems to remember it as well and comes forward.

"Astronomy Tower, tomorrow at ten in the morning." He scowls, "don't be late Weasley."

Albus snickers, "funny she told me to tell you that earlier."

I sigh.

_If we only knew._

* * *

**February 13, 2021**

"Rose!"

Surprised, I quickly turn around. I can feel my eyes wide and my hands shaking. The idea of getting caught did not cross my mind. I manage to compose myself to look neutral and embrace my sanity to what is about to happen. Here, a few feet away from me, stands no other than Scorpius Malfoy. He's out of breath and his eyes are fixated on me. My heart starts to hammer again and I can already feel the pain coming.

I sigh.

"Scorpius?"

He frowns and starts moving closer. No, _no bloody way. _He.. He couldn't have... I saw it from afar. He notices my bemused expression and decides to come closer. Every inch he takes feels like a stab in my chest.

"Rose," he finally speaks up, "I can explain."

I mentally curse myself. _He did see me._

I smile.

"It's okay Scorp. It's none of my business, really."

* * *

**Cliffy, I know. Exciting!  
**

**Next chapter: Valentine's Day! xx**


	4. Quatre

For those who are deeply confused by the dates, just subtract them from 2024. I promise to mention what year they are in every time the year changes. It'll probably change again, soon. Enjoy! x

**Disclaimer: **All rights go to JK Rowling.

* * *

**February 13, 2019**

I arrived just in time for my meeting with Ro—I mean, Weasley. I look at my Muggle watch and see that I'm a bit early. _Yes_, I do own a Muggle watch, a son and a grandson of former Death Eaters. I shove the thought away…not wanting to think about the past. My grandfather's dead and my father has changed, thanks to my mother. Apparently, mum's fascinated by every Muggle invention she encounters. She once took me and my dad to Muggle London when I was little and merlin, I kept walking around with my jaw hanging ten feet from the ground. She bought us all sorts of things and I could tell that my dad was fascinated by them as much as I was. When we got home, mum kept teasing dad how she felt like she was responsible for two five-year-olds. Ever since then, when mum would be out of the country, dad would bring me to Muggle London and we'd buy all sorts of things. This watch that I'm staring at right now was one of it.

I sigh. I crease my brows when I come to the conclusion that it's already pass ten and Weasley's not here yet. I knew it. Of course she'd be late again. Trust Weasley to not be on time when it comes to a meeting with _Malfoy, _as she bitterly says my name. I mean, I don't even know why she hates me that much. I know I'm pretty much rude to her all the time, but that's just because when I see her I get tense and the only words that manage to come out of my mouth are the ones that can get her ticked and all. _Well_, it does fascinate me seeing Weasley all hyped up, set ready to kill. I smirk at the image of it.

"Oh you're here already!"

Finally. I took a deep breath and looked up. She's wearing Muggle clothes like me. To think about it, I've never really seen her in one. When I spent Christmas with Albus at their grandparent's house, she wasn't there. I didn't bother to ask since the subject came up by itself. It appears that her family was spending Christmas with Rose's Muggle grandparents. Rose.. I just called her Rose in my mind. I must be out of it.

"Malfoy?"

I flinch at her voice. She's looks at me intriguingly and I notice that I have been staring at her.

I avert my gaze.

"You're late, Weasley."

"I'm sorry, there's this book I've been reading and I lost track of time," she explains.

Did _Rose Weasley_ just apologize or am I out of it again?

"Let's just get it over with," I state. I mean we did come here to practice after all.

She frowns. "Fine. Just stand there while I move back a bit."

Trust Weasley to get all bossy. I do as I'm told and take my wand from my pocket.

"Make sure to use legal spells Malfoy," she warns me.

I smirk at her remark. It seems that she was referring to that argument we had the other day. I told her I would be willing to _Crucio _her. Ha. Trust Weasley to take it seriously.

"Scared Weasley?" I can see her tighten her grip on her wand. "Relax, we're here to practice defensive spells. Actually no. Let me rephrase that, for _you_ to practice."

When we both arrived late for class yesterday, I knew Professor Harth would immediately partner us together. Before the class ended every student was asked to demonstrate defensive spells fluidly with their partner as their opponent. Lucky for me, I got Weasley. Piece of cake I say. She kept aiming at everything _but_ me. And to think that Professor Harth said that our skills_ matched _and all that rubbish saying we could handle each other.

"You don't have to remind me Malfoy. And you don't have to brag about it either," she pouts.

Cute.

_Wait_, what? Did I just think that Weasley was cute?

I grunt, mentally punching myself for thinking such nonsense.

"Just aim something at me and we'll work from there." I loosen my grip thinking that it probably won't hit me.

I see her take a deep breath. "Stupefy!"

Nice.

Just what I was expecting.

"Prote—" I manage to say for a split second before I'm interrupted with an image of a bird slowly falling in front of me.

Am I seeing it right?

"Did you just stupefy a bird?!" I ask in shocking disbelief.

She just stupefied a _bird._ I snigger for a moment and when I'm faced with Weasley's shaken face, I burst out of laughter. The next thing you know I'm kneeling on the floor clutching my stomach. I laugh, I laugh louder and I snort, I laugh even louder and I snort. I laugh my loudest and—

"Cut it out Malfoy!" she yelps. "I was perfectly aiming at you and if the bird hadn't flown by it would have hit you instead." She states as-a-matter-of-fact.

I snort and eventually stopped laughing. Come to think of it, she's probably right. _Or not_. I saw the bird flying above me before we even started. If she didn't hit the bird the spell would have hit the air instead. Still not me. She was close though. Something must have gone wrong.

"Hey Weasley, do it again. But this time, aim at that rocking chair." If I think what I think is right, I might just be able to help this girl.

"Why?" she raises her eyebrow unsure if I'm coming up with something to embarrass her.

"Just do it, I think I have an idea to why you aim so badly. Not to mention you being in Ravenclaw and all."

She sneers at my remark.

"You want to get better at this or what?"

She thinks it over and decides to do it. "Okay," she tightens her grip. She points her wand at the rocking chair. "Stupefy!"

I knew it.

"I missed it again," she groans. "Why is this so bloody hard!"

"You're doing it wrong."

"What?" she replies as if I spoke another language. it sounds as if she's never been told that she's doing something wrong.

"The way you flick your wand, it's wrong." I explain. "See this?" I motion to my wand imitating what she did earlier. "You flick your wand diagonally while uttering the spell. You have to move it to the right before directly aiming it at someone. Try it again."

We kept practicing but the spell never seemed to hit me. I kept showing her different ways to flick the wand and she failed every time we tried. No matter how many times we failed though, she never seemed to give up. She kept trying and trying. I told her to take a break and that no one really gets it the first time. She just needs to practice.

"Well, you managed to do it right away just by staring at Professor Harth's hands." She gasps realizing what she just said.

"Weasley," I smirk. "I did not notice that I was being observed at all."

"I didn't... I mean, I don't, I just—"

"Save it," I interrupt, not wanting to hear her excuse. I caught her, and we should leave it at that. "We should go, I'm starving and we've been practicing for more than two hours."

"Wait!" she comes closer, a little hesitant. She seems to be contemplating what to say. She eventually speaks, "can we continue this tomorrow? I mean, I'm not going anywhere for Valentine's day and…"

"Weasley? Are you asking me out?" I raise a brow.

"No! Hell no!" she shakes her head and waves her hands.

With that said I actually felt a prick of disappointment. Wait. What? Was I expecting her to ask me out?

Merlin, Scorpius. You're really out of it.

"No! I am asking you out," _Okay, rewind. What?_ "I mean, to practice, that's all! Unless of course you're spending Valentine's with someone then—"

"No one Weasley. And yes, I guess we could practice more, seeing as you're begging for it."

"Okay," she seems to have ignored my last remark. She smiled, "thank you."

Did she just—no, is she smiling, _at _me? In a millisecond my world froze—right there, right at that moment. I was about to start staring again. But I turned and I walked away and my legs were shaking like jelly with each step down the stairs. I knew she was watching me walk away and possibly waiting for me to turn back to see her still smiling and I would've liked to see her smiling again. I would have liked my world to freeze again, but I didn't turn around. I kept going, her image in my mind. I've seen her smile before, but not at me. That image was in my mind and I knew it wasn't going anywhere.

_If she only knew._

* * *

**So that was coming from Scorpius' POV.**

**R&R! xx  
**


	5. Cinq

**Disclaimer: **All rights go to JK Rowling.

* * *

**February 14, 2019**

"Wake up Rose! Rose! Wake up!"

I wake to a jumping Louis on my bed.

"Happy Valentine's Day!"

He smiles. He seems very happy. I look around and notice that my roommates are still sleeping. It must still be early.

I yawn. "Louis, why are you so excited?"

He gasps.

"You don't remember?" his tone slightly disappointed.

I'm suddenly reminded of that day during Transfigurations when Louis confessed how he asked some girl for Valentine's. What was her name again? Oh yeah, Haley Brown.

I sit up and look at Louis. "I still don't see why you're so excited. We're not allowed to go to Hogsmade. And last time I checked, there's not a place here in Hogwarts where you can get all romantic and—"

"I'm aware of that Rosie," he mutters, silencing me. "That's why you haven't seen me for a while. I've been preparing for this day."

Ah. I see.

"No wonder. I thought you forgot about me." I sheepishly say.

"Don't be silly Rose." He rolls his eyes. "Well, aren't you wondering what I've prepared?"

Slightly curious I nod.

"Well, go shower then and meet me at the common room. I can't wait for you to see it!" he shrieks excitedly.

I chuckle a bit. No wonder we're best friends. Louis can be such a girl.

I stand up and hum while I walk towards the bathroom. I still feel a bit sleepy so I decide to shower right away. I hurry a bit not wanting to encounter a probably impatient—by now—Louis downstairs. When I stepped out of the shower I looked at my reflection in the mirror. I sigh. I look so much like my mother, except for the red hair and evident freckles. I dry my hair with a spell and start to find some Muggle clothes to wear seeing as it's the weekend and we don't have classes. When I'm all ready, I step out of my room and hurry to our Ravenclaw common room.

Aha.

I find Louis standing impatiently beside the portrait door. I apologize and we leave the common room. Louis leads while I follow. We walk down a short, dark, carpeted Hallway. I don't see rooms anywhere and I start to get curious.

"Louis, where are we going?"

"Just wait Rose."

We keep walking until Louis comes to a stop. I look around and I don't see why we've stopped. There are still no rooms around. I look at my cousin, my expression asking if there's something wrong.

"We're going to walk right through that wall." He explains.

"What?" I reply disbelievingly. Walk through a wall? Is he out of it?

"Just do as I say. Hold on to me while we walk through it and think what I'm thinking."

Oh yeah. Definitely out of it.

"Yes Louis, I can already master Legilimens." I added sarcastically.

He's starting to get impatient and I can see that he's actually serious. "Just say that you want to go where Louis wants to go"

He grabs my forearm and starts to walk towards the wall. I gulp for air and close my eyes. I repeatedly mumble 'where Louis wants to go, where Louis wants to go'. We keep walking until we come to a sudden halt.

I open my eyes and they automatically widen as I absorb the sight in front of me. I'm in some kind of room (well, I think it's a room) and there's a mantle spread on the floor. On top of the floor there's a basket that I've come to recognize as those kinds of baskets Muggles use when they go on picnics. Adjacent to the basket, there's a big lamp and a few roses. I look up and instead of finding the usual ceiling, I see stars. And there's even a _moon_. Okay, freeze. Last time I checked it was broad daylight and I remember waking up just a couple of minutes ago. I see Louis from the corner of my eye and nudge him.

"Louis, did we like," a little hesitant, I continue, "I mean.. did you _apparate?_" I asked, with an obvious hint of surprise in my voice.

For a second he looks at me with a bewildered expression and starts to laugh.

Did I say something funny?

I glare at Louis and I'm suddenly reminded of a laughing Malfoy. Wait, expunge that image of Scorpius Malfoy. Don't even think about it Rose. He's rude, obnoxious, and arrogant and everything wrong with the world. And you Rose Weasley do not have a crush on him. And when you see him later, you will not be awed by his presence—not that you ever were—Oh bugger. I suddenly realize that I asked him to spend Valentine's with me. Well, not in that sense since all we're going to do is practice. I take a deep breath and realize that Louis has stopped laughing.

I continue to glare at my cousin. There's nothing funny about my question. How else was he suppose to have managed to bring me here, wherever this is.

"Rose," he snorts, "this is what they call the Room of Requirement."

The _what?_

He starts explaining what it does and how I can use it as well. I try to absorb into every detail. I mean, this is just _amazing_.

"James showed it to me," he clarifies. "After I asked Haley out I realized that there wasn't anywhere we could actually spend Valentine's together so I went to James."

"And he actually helped you?" James Potter, Albus' brother, not to mention a Gryffindor, who's now in his third year at Hogwarts, usually does not help anyone unless he benefits something out of it.

"I was surprised as well. But he told me to meet him at the hallway we were just in earlier. And we did everything I was told you to do. At first I thought it was his idea of a joke and that I was going to crash on the wall," Louis chuckles a bit at this, "but we ended up here and I was as shocked as you."

"Wow. Louis, this is amazing." I say as my eyes wonder around the room. "If Haley does not fall in love with you spot on, I'm going to drag her to St. Mungo's."

"I appreciate it," he gives me a brief wink.

"James started teasing me though." Louis added crisply. "Saying I was too young to be dating."

I smile at my cousin. "He's just jealous you have a girlfriend and he doesn't."

* * *

We started walking through a series of corridors. There are portraits everywhere. There is colour and light and a feeling of comfort. There are people walking everywhere and they are all smiling. I can feel Malfoy staring at me, but I stare straight ahead.

"Where are we going?"

"I know a place where we can practice. Everything we need will be there."

I momentary look at the boy walking beside me. He's not staring anymore. I avert my gaze and do the same. We walk silently together as I try to remember how to get to the Room of Requirement.

We turn around the corner and we're suddenly brought to a halt.

"Oh Albus! You're so sweet!" comes a squeaky voice.

Oh Merlin.

Did I hear that right?

And I think,

No.

_I'm sure_ that's not coming from a girl's voice.

Scorpius clears his throat.

In front of us stand both Albus and Felix, apparently _hugging_ each other. I blink. They immediately break apart and turn around with a surprised look suddenly aware of our presence.

Everyone remains silent.

Now, this is awkward.

"Scorpius?" says a surprised Felix.

"with Rose?" adds Albus.

I raise a brow. Are they surprised because we caught them in their little moment there, or the fact that me and Scor—I mean, Malfoy are together?

"Is there something I should know of?" Malfoy pipes at them.

"What?" Albus asks, looking slightly confused.

Felix starts to laugh and moved towards Malfoy.

"Mate, what were you thinking? I was helping Albus practice." He explains.

"Practice for what?" Scorpius raises his brow.

"I..well," I can see a slight blush forming on Albus' cheeks.

Now that's something. Albus Potter does not _blush._ He's as arrogant and apathetic as his best friend. Well, I guess people do tend to surprise you once in a while.

"I plan to give Cindy this rose and I didn't want to look like an idiot." He motions to the flower he's holding, "and Felix went overboard by hugging me."

Oh, so that's why Felix squeaked earlier.

"I did not!" Felix objects. "That's how girls react when they're given something by the guy they like."

Albus glares at Felix and Malfoy starts laughing. They all realize the situation and start laughing all together. That's nice. Am I the only one who doesn't see the humor in this? Apparently not. It seems that Malfoy does as well. He stops laughing and directs that nerve-wrecking smirk at me.

He pats both Albus and Felix on the back and motion towards my direction.

"Stop laughing." His smirk widens, "you're uptight cousin might pop a nerve."

Great, this is so unfair. Three against one.

"Relax Scorp," Albus smiles, "and loosen up Rose."

Woah.

Did _my_ cousin slash _Malfoy's_ bestfriend just defended me?

Someone _please_ hit me with a buldger. This must be a dream.

Okay, I'm overreacting a bit.

Albus notices my bemused expression and chuckles. "Hey, I'm in those moods. And I'm guessing you guys are together for practice?"

Oh yeah, practice. How could I forget. Why else would I be with _Malfoy_.

With that said, said boy grabs my forearm and starts dragging me away. I heard Felix whistle and somewhere between Albus' laughter, I kept hearing a "Scorpius and Rose sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g, first comes love then comes marriage, then comes Albus in a baby carriage!" The singing stopped and I turned around to find a struggling Felix on the ground and a triumphant looking Albus pining him down.

We keep walking until we manage to arrive at a short, dark, carpeted hallway. I stopped Malfoy from walking and told him to wait. He looks at me with a perplexed expression that states 'there's nothing here'. I motion towards the wall and tell him that this is where we'll be practicing.

He raises a brow.

Ha.

This must have been fun for James and Louis.

"Right there," I point towards the wall, "is the Room of Requirement."

Malfoy's eyes suddenly widen at the name of the room.

"Rose! That's brilliant!" he suddenly grips my shoulder.

Did he just call me _Rose?_ Apparently he didn't notice.

"You know about this room?" I quickly ask, still absorbed by his hands on my shoulder.

He notices this and moves his hands away. "Yeah, dad told me all about it. He spent a lot of time in this room during," he peeks at me unsure if he should continue.

"The war?" I finish for him. "Uncle Harry told me and Albus all about it. He says your dad made a mistake and well, everyone does. And they shouldn't be judged by it for life."

I pause to look at him. He's somewhat unmoved. Frozen on his spot.

"And plus, Albus keeps saying how your dad treats him like a son and how I should give you a chance since you're not that bad, not to mention sometimes nice and really smart and all." I stop. I just gave my arch enemy a compliment. Or should I say, _compliments?_ I cover my mouth with my hands to prevent further revelations.

_Oh bloody hell. _Trust me to let something else slip.

His expression suddenly turns blank. He sort of looks like he's been hit by ten buldgers. I decide to take a few steps back and the unexpected happens. Or should I say shocking?

He smiles.

"I wasn't expecting to hear that."

He stares at me. I stare back.

Then it suddenly hits me. He's a conceited eleven year old.

"Why," is all I manage to say.

"What?"

"Why weren't you expecting to hear that?"

"What?"

We stare at each other.

"Oh come on, you've got an ego the size of Hogwarts. I just want to know why."

"You already know why."

"I don't."

"Yes, you do."

"No, I don't."

"You do. You just want to hear me say it."

"Why." I hold his gaze.

He takes a deep breath. "It's just, you always get so heated when I'm around. I know I annoy the living hell out of you but it's like you reserve this loathsome gaze just for me. I mean, I've seen you around your other cousins who annoy you as much as I do, even worse, I think, and well you let them slip. With me it's like a dragon seeing its prey for the first time. Set, ready to kill. I just don't see why we can't be friends."

I absorb everything I just heard.

I smiled. "I didn't know you felt that way."

"It's true."

We were standing a foot apart, staring at each other, Grey and Blue, locked and loaded. My mind suddenly went blank. No yesterday, no hatred, no bitterness. Everything froze and there's nothing else. There's only me staring at him.

_And I knew._

* * *

**R&R x**


	6. Six

The dates are sometimes random so don't really mind them. Focus on the year! x

**Disclaimer:** All right go to JK Rowling

* * *

**January 3, 2020**

"_Cut ventrally through the rectus abdominis of the Rana Vittigera..." _ I do as the book says and started cutting through the abdomen. The Rana has a bit of a thick skin so I started to put pressure. It still won't cut through so I decide to stab it.

"Stop it Weasley," comes a voice behind me. "You're killing the poor thing."

_Poor thing?_ I stopped and turned around to glare at my potions partner. Oh finally. Look who decided to show up. We agreed to become friends last year and I can't believe I ended up telling Professor Slughorn that it was okay to continue having Malfoy as my partner. I loosely fold my arms and my glare intensifies.

He smirks. "Are you giving _me_ The Rose Glare?"

"It's already dead Malfoy," I spew out. "Care to explain why you're fifteen minutes late?"

His smirk widens. You see, even though we have become _friends_ and there are times that we're actually nice to each other, if there is still one thing that drives me mad to a point of no return it would be The Malfoy Smirk. Yes, I have also given it a name. Ever since Albus was brilliant enough to come up with _The Rose Glare_, I have devoted my days into figuring out a comeback. And unfortunately, _The Malfoy Smirk_ was the only thing I've come up with. It sounds just as pathetic as _The Rose Glare_.

He starts to move closer and stops when he's standing right beside me.

"Weasley, I was just gone for a while. Does my absence affect you that much?" he says mockingly.

"Not when we're suppose to be doing something together," my tone rising a bit. "So where were you?" I slowly say it over pronouncing every word, making sure it gets into that thick skull of his.

He doesn't respond right away. I wait for it but he just starts stirring the liquid in the cauldron. He stops after stirring it twice and reaches for the ingredient. I slap his hand away before he manages to get hold of it.

I look at him. He looks back.

"Quidditch try outs. Ring a bell? Sign-ups were this morning." He explains. "We told Professor Sulghorn about it in advance so there was no point in coming on time."

Oh yeah. The sign-up sheets for Quidditch were posted this morning. The tryouts would be held after potions. How could I forget? Of course Malfoy would be one of the firsts to join. I would have signed up as well but decided to first fully adjust myself with school work. I figured there will still be another chance for me to try out next year or the next, or the year after that. But wait a minute, he said _we. _

"By saying _we_ you mean?"

"Albus and I," he says as-a-matter-of-fact.

Of course, they probably take bubble baths together.

I quiver at the image that I just formed in my mind. I look around and realize that Albus and Felix were just starting with their potion. Felix must have waited for Albus to arrive. I snort. Add that one in the bath tub. Speaking of potions I should go back to what I was doing earlier. I hold the Rana with my left hand and the knife on my right. I'm about to stab it once again but before I do so thin pale fingers grab my arm and pull it away.

"I told you not to stab it," he speaks. "Did you not read the instructions Weasley?"

"Obviously" I look down at the book and motion through the words. "It perfectly says to cut through the rectus abdominis of the Rana Vittigera. Make sure to not—"

I gasp. My eyes suddenly widen.

"Stab it." Malfoy finishes. "I'm seriously bemused to why you were sorted in Ravenclaw. If you stab it then you would've damaged the fats. And that Weasley is what we need to complete the potion."

I didn't read the rest of the sentence, so what? If he was here earlier I wouldn't have been pre-occupied with his whereabouts. Not that I care anyway. Over the summer I have perfectly convinced myself that I did not have a crush on Scorpius Malfoy. When I see him my stomach flips and I start to feel sick. Every time he comes near I can hardly breathe. So what else could explain that queasiness I feel when his around. His presence is nauseating I say.

My thoughts snap when he lightly pushed me to the side and started cutting through the abdomen horizontally. I'm about to stop him when I notice the skin starting to open. Awed, I continue to watch as he begins to cut ventrally from the middle for a bigger opening. He starts to carefully dig in with his fingers and successfully removing the fats. Amazed, I absentmindedly squealed.

The next thing I know, my arms are wrapped around the pale boy beside me.

I felt his body stiffen.

I realize the circumstances I've just put us in and quickly pulled back leaving enough space between the both of us. The room fell in total silence. I look around and everyone has stopped what they were doing, including Professor Slughorn. They were all staring. My stomach begins to flip. My insides are screaming and I'm nervous. It's awkward and I'm nervous. I see Louis and his mouth has frozen to a shape of a big O. From the corner of my eye I notice Albus. Expecting the same reaction to Louis' I turn around. To my surprise he's actually _smiling._ I crease my brow in confusion.

* * *

Professor Slughorn who has been silently watching, clears his throat. Everyone snaps and went back to what they were doing. Felix starts laughing.

"It's not funny" I speak.

"Yes it is. Look at their faces," he laughs even more. "Even Scorpius is _blushing_."

I turn to look at my cousin and my best friend whose faces seemed to have replicated a tomato. I watch as Rose slowly cuts through the ingredients. Scorpius, apparently still frozen on the spot, just stares at her. He stares at the way Rose is leaning forward reading the instructions. He stares at the way she flips the pages. His eyes are moving back and forth staring at her face to her hands pushing her hair away, putting it behind her ear. He stares at her lips and _bloody hell_ why am I watching all this. I shake my head and nudge Felix with my elbow.

"Felix look" I motion towards the duo.

Felix raises his left brow not catching my drift.

"Can't you see what's happening?"

"Well," he studies the scene in front of him, "Rose is stirring and she keeps glancing at Scorpius. Scorpius is staring and his face is—"

I smack the back of his head. "No! Don't you see?"

"What?"

"And they don't even have a clue."

He scratches his head. I point at the romantic atmosphere and continue with my point.

"They'll fall in love and here's the bottom line: Our trio's up to four!"

Felix brightens at the idea and looks at me with agreement. "Sweet!"

I've made my point, and we both high-five.

We finish our potions assignment and we walk towards Scorpius. I can see that Rose is now with Louis and this idiot is still staring at her. I clear my throat and he snaps.

"You okay mate?" I grin.

"Uh, yeah" he looks at his watch. "Let's go."

* * *

The three of us walk through the crowded corridor. It's noisy and a few Slytherins seem excited. They are probably heading to the Quidditch field to watch the tryouts. I look around hoping to catch a glimpse of a particular person. She's not here. I suddenly feel nervous.

"Albus, if we make the team I swear I'm going to kiss you" I whisper.

Albus backs away a bit but smirks. He doesn't say anything. I can tell he's as nervous as I am. Felix grabs both of our shoulders as we near the pitch, gives them a reassuring squeeze and bides us good luck.

We arrive at the pitch and I take a deep breath. I feel like throwing up but I hold it in. I tighten my grip on my broom and continue to walk to the center where everyone seems to be gathering. I see Leonard Zabini, Slytherin's Quidditch captain and not to mention Felix's brother. He silences us and tells us to move closer.

"Okay so, here's how we're going to do it…" he speaks loud enough for everyone to hear, "we're going to play a few rounds until the snitch is caught, switching sides from here and then. And just because you were in the team last year does not guarantee you a spot for this year."

At this, I tense a bit. Albus and I are the only second years trying out. I know Leonard though, and he's a fair captain. He divides us into two and signals us to move. Albus is trying out for the Seeker's spot and I'm going for one of the Chasers. I fly up and I can feel the adrenaline rush through my veins. I position myself somewhere in the center. I can hear loud cheers from the background but don't bother to look. If I see her I might freeze on the spot.

Leonard blows the whistle and the tryout begins. Someone on our side catches the Quaffle and passes it to someone else. That person flies toward one of the hoops to the left. He's planning to score but I already see the Keeper watching his move. I move closer and wait for him to throw the Quaffle at the left hoop. He throws it and I zoom. I manage to catch the Quaffle before the Keeper does. The Keeper's right beside me so I ducked forward and threw it at the central hoop. He speeds forward to catch it but the Quaffle already got in. The game goes on. I get hold of the Quaffle and as I was ready to pass it to someone else the whistle blew. I looked around and I caught the site of Albus holding the snitch. Game over. I grin at Albus mouthing a "that was fast."

We all start landing and gather once again at the center of the pitch.

"Fast game," Leonard speaks, "But I managed to take a good look at everyone. Now just wait here until I announce who's made the team." He starts talking to one of the Chasers who was in the team last year and we wait patiently.

This time I decide to look up. I was right. I knew she would be watching. She's sitting between Felix and Louis Weasley. They're chattering her up but she looks distracted. From afar I can see how the wind blows her hair into her face. She moves it away and locks them behind her ear. The wind blows again and her hair's released. She puts it back but the wind keeps blowing it into her face. She could just face the other side but she doesn't. She knows she's going to see me. She probably thinks I'm going to be staring. The wind blows stronger and she gives up. She turns around and sees me. We lock eyes and I hold her gaze until her cousin and Felix stood up. She stood up as well, turned around and walked out.

"Scorpius! Scorpius we made it!"

I turn at the direction to where the voice came from. I see Albus rushing to my side while the others are leaving the pitch.

"What?"

He chuckles at my perplexed expression. "If you weren't staring at Rose for so long you would have heard Leonard call our names!"

My heart pounds and I punch Albus on the arm. "We made it! I knew it!"

We smile at each other and we leave. We change into our school robes and walk towards the castle. We're greeted by an anxious Felix once we enter.

"Way to go!" He cheers, "I heard from Leonard that you guys made it. He said it was the fastest tryout they ever had. I thought so too, I was watching the entire time."

He swings his left arm over my shoulder and his right to Albus. We start walking through the hallway leading to the Great Hall. Albus talks about how he managed to catch the snitch so fast. He was eyeing it the whole time and just waited for the right moment. We arrive at the Great Hall and we're greeted by the Bloody Baron. Despite the rumors, he's actually nice to us.

"I'm starving. Watching you guys the entire time made me hungry," Felix complains, "Louis and I started talking about food."

"Wasn't Weasley with you guys?" I ask.

"Didn't I just say _Louis_ and I?" Felix replies, emphasizing Louis' name.

"E blent Roe," Albus rambles with his mouth full.

I snort at this but understand it either way. He quickly swallows his food seeing as Felix didn't understand a thing.

"He meant Rose." He continues.

"Oh," Felix nods in comprehension. "You should have said so," he looks at me. "_Rose_, didn't really talk much. She kept cheering and all that."

Albus suddenly looks at me with an I-think-I-know-what-you're-thinking look. I raise my brow giving him an I-don't-know-what-you're-talking-about look.

"She was mainly cheering for you Scorp," Felix snorts, "and she was actually using your _first_ name."

I shot Felix a disbelieving look as Albus nudges my right rib.

"Speaking of who," he motions over to someone who. I look up to find that 'someone' was Rose and by the looks of it, is approaching the Slytherin table.

Is she going to sit with _me_?

"Hey guys," she sits beside Albus, who's facing me across the table with a grin.

"Hey cousin!" Albus greets her over excitingly as if announcing the whole table of her presence.

"Hey Rose," Felix smiles.

All three of them look at me.

"Hi."

Hi? That's it? You're a git. I'm a bloody git. I mentally punch myself.

Silent befalls.

"So, uh," she breaks the silence, "I heard you two made Quidditch. Congratulations!"

"Thanks Rose," Albus nods, "but why are you sitting here? Don't get me wrong, we don't mind. It's just tha—"

"Well Louis is with Haley and," she looks at me and continues, "I figured since you're my other friends, I might as well sit with you guys."

Oh so we're rebounds now? I shake the thought away. Rebound or not, it doesn't matter.

"Sure Weasley," I smirk. She looks away.

Albus clears his throat. "Didn't you guys agree to become friends last year?"

I look at Albus. He seems to have something in mind.

"What's your point?" I shot him a glare.

"So," he continues, giving me a stop-glaring-or-I-will-punch-you-in-the-face look, "shouldn't you both be on a first-name basis?"

_Rose?  
_

I look at her.

She looks back. She smiles and I freeze again.

And at that moment, right there, on that table with all these people—

_I knew._

_

* * *

_

**Yes, he knew she knew they knew. But what are they going to do about it? ;)**

**So I added Albus' POV. I think it was quite important seeing as he's somewhat the linking force between Rose and Scorpius.**

**P.S: thanks for those who added this story on their story alerts. xxx**

**R&R!x  
**


	7. Sept

**Disclaimer:** All rights go to JK Rowling

* * *

**February 13, 2021**

You know that feeling of anticipation and hope combined with fret or unease? One of those mornings you wake up and you ask yourself: What do I want? Why? What do I _need_? Because. And you start to pile up lists of what you want and what you think you need. But despite all the things you've come up with, all the plans, you find yourself asking again. _Really_? Is that _really_ it? It leaves you puzzled and you let it go. You decide that maybe that's just how life is. You wonder, you think you know the answer, and conclude in the end that you don't. So you let it go. You move on.

I shift my gaze from the ceiling to the portrait door when I hear voices from outside the common room. Slightly curious, I lean on the portrait.

"_I can't believe you don't know the password!"_

"_Well excuse me, I thought you'd know by now. Seeing as Rose is your sister."_

"_She said I wasn't allowed to know and why do you need to talk to her any—"_

I open the portrait and immediately find two bewildered faces. I grin at my cousin, Lily and my brother, Hugo. Fortunately and slightly unfortunately, it was their first year in Hogwarts. Fortunately, well, because the more cousins the better. Plus, I've really missed having Hugo and Lily around. Unfortunately, these two do tend to get annoying at times.

"What are you guys doing?"

"Hey Rose!" says a relieved Lily. "We need to talk."

"Yeah, so now that you've found her," interrupts Hugo, "I'm heading back to eat."

He turns around and walks away. I turn to Lily and she opens her mouth to say something but hesitates and closes it back. I quirk an eyebrow and she flashes me one of those innocent smiles.

"Rose, I think there's something you should know." Well, finally.

I lead her back to the Ravenclaw common room and we sit on one of those chairs facing the window. The moment I face her she starts to speak.

"Okay so here it is. You know how over the summer you mentioned that you might have feelings for Scorpius?" she pauses but continues right away seeing as the question's rhetorical, "well Hugo and I were in the Great Hall earlier and when we went to the Slytherin table to talk to Albus, there was this girl.." She bitterly emphasizes the word girl and continues, "flirting and hanging all over Scorpius."

I look at her from the corner of my eye, unsure to how I should react. Should I even care? I suppose I should have seen this coming. We are in our third year, where hormones have probably started kicking in for boys. We're going to have this trip to Hogsmeade soon so I'm guessing.. Well, I would've thought that he'd want to go with Albus, Felix, or me.

Lily speaks up interrupting the silence. "He didn't look interested though, but he did flirt back a _bit_."

"It's okay Lily," I give her a reassuring smile. "He, Albus and the rest of them are in that stage," I explain, "so I don't really mind." Yeah right.

We start talking about other things. In between Lily's prolonged stories I find myself looking out the window and imagining how it would look like being with Scorpius. I wouldn't want him to be perfect, I'd just want him to accept me, want me, make fun of me, kiss me, and make me watch him play Quidditch. I shrugged the thought away. I've been really doing that a lot huh.

When Lily finished, my stomach started to grumble so we headed towards the Great Hall. When we arrived I asked her if she could sit with me and Louis. I really didn't want to become third party seeing as Haley's been sitting with us ever since she and Louis got together. I mean, I don't really mind, I like Haley a lot, there are just those times when I feel out of place. We walk towards the Ravenclaw table and both Lily and I sat across Louis. I couldn't find myself to look at the table behind ours afraid of what I might see. If what Lily has told me earlier was indeed correct, there's no way on Earth I would want to witness it myself.

"So Lily, how's Hogwarts working for you?" Louis speaks.

"Pretty great," Lily shrugs while taking a bite from Louis' pie. "And there's this boy, you wouldn't believe—"

I nudge my cousin and snatch the pie off her hands to take a bite myself, "Lily, seriously? Is that all you think about? Boys? Aren't you a tad too young?" I cock an eyebrow.

She snatches the pie back and finishes the rest of it. "Well weren't you also a _tad too young_ when you star—"

I kicked her foot from under the table before she let's anything else slip out. I haven't had the chance to tell Louis about my—what I think are—feelings for Scorpius. His family went to France over the summer and I just couldn't bring up the subject in school seeing as Haley's around all the time. It's not that I don't trust her, I just, well; I don't want to make a big deal about it and prefer to tell only a person or two.

Louis notices the exchange of glances between Lily and I and shakes his head in disagreement. "Age. Who cares?" He starts to put an arm around Haley. "When you see it, you just know, you know?" he flashes a grin and looks at Haley, "regardless how young people say you are."

Haley's cheeks started to form little spots of red and leaned closer to Louis. "Thank Merlin you're cute."

Both Lily and I roll our eyes at how corny they both sounded.

* * *

After Herbology with the Gryffindors, my ears were still throbbing from re-potting the Mandrakes. I noticed Louis walking beside me on our way out of Herbology. Then I noticed something else. Haley wasn't with him for a change.

"Where's Haley?"

Louis glanced to a group of Gryffindor and Ravenclaw girls and shrugged. "She's supposed to spend time with her friends after every Herbology and Transfigurations class."

I look at my cousin momentarily confused. "What do you mean? Is that like a rule?"

"More like a schedule," Louis said tilting his head from side to side.

"You made a schedule?" I asked, surprised and slightly glad.

"No, her friend Cindy did." He went on, "saying how she spends all her time with me." He clears his throat and mimics Cindy's squeaky voice, "You're always with him and sometimes it makes me feel like I don't have a best friend...blah blah blah."

_Damn right._ I wanted to say that I agreed but gave him a satisfying laugh instead. Maybe Cindy and I should ditch our best friends and befriend ourselves in exchange. Cindy does seem like a pleasant company. I remember Albus having a crush on her on our first year. He even went as far as to pushing his cocky, but wimpy-around-selected-girls manhood as to give her a rose during Valentine's Day. The next day, he came to potions with a sulking face and an erratic attitude. Felix murmured something about Cindy, rejected, and I took it from there. I find out later on from Albus that Cindy did accept the rose but immediately walked away afterwards. I sigh. The girl was probably nervous and stupid cousin of mine took it as rejection.

When we reached the castle I swung my arms around Louis, glad that I finally get to spend time with my cousin slash best friend. I look around the corridors, couple of people walking here and there.

"Rose, you've been awfully silent." Louis said. "You okay?"

_Am I okay? Of course I'm okay._ Life is fantastic. "Louis, there's something I've been itching to tell you," I said. "I think I—"

We stopped walking. In my chest, my heart seized. Oh. My. Bloody. Hell. No, this _isn't_ happening. I felt as if some dominant force held me to my spot, and forcibly narrowing my eyes forward. I just told _life_ that I did not want to see this. A long paused followed while my stunned brain tried to process what was happening in front of me: Two people facing each other. The _girl_ is smiling, the boy's not. The girl moves closer, she's leaning and she..she.. I searched for breath. That girl just kissed Scorpius. Finally, my synapses started activating. I grabbed Louis and broke into a run.

"Rose wait," Louis tried to stop me, "what's going on? Why are we running? Was that Malfoy?" he asked, in between his catch of breaths.

"Just run Louis," I continue dragging him. "You reckon he saw us?"

We reached the stairs but were hauled back. Oh _shit._ I quickly turn but sigh in relief.

"James," both Louis and I announce.

He flashes a wide grin and loosely folds his arms forward. "What are you two up to?" and cocks and arrogant eyebrow.

"Nothing," Louis looks at me and I roll my eyes. "We were just racing each other."

He starts stroking his beardless chin. "Well I need to borrow Louis for a while." He pulls Louis' robe, "Ciao cousin!" and winks at me. Louis hesitates a bit, not wanting to leave me by myself. James however, whispers something in his ear. Realization dawns on his face and he obliges.

I glare at their backs as I watch them walk away. Great, leave poor little Rose Weasley. Nevertheless, I continue to walk along the corridors hoping to forget what happened earlier. I started to sing. It was either that or cry.

"Hey Rose!"

Surprised, I quickly turn around. I can feel my eyes wide and my hands shaking. The idea of getting caught did not cross my mind. I manage to compose myself to look neutral and embrace my sanity to what is about to happen. Here, a few feet away from me, stands no other than Scorpius Malfoy. He's out of breath and his eyes are fixated on me. My heart starts to hammer again and I can already feel the pain coming ones again.

I sigh. "Scorpius?"

He frowns and starts moving closer. No, he couldn't have... I saw it from afar. He notices my bemused expression and decides to come closer. Every inch he takes feels like a stab on my chest.

"Rose," he finally speaks up, "I can explain."

I mentally curse myself. _He did see me._

I smile.

"It's okay Scorpius. It's none of my business."

"I don't like her," he hurriedly states, "I mean, we were just flirting earlier and she started following me out." He continues to speak leaving no space for interruptions or chances of me walking away. "Hogsmeade came up and she wanted to go with me, I said nothing and she took it as a yes and kissed me."

I looked away and he grabbed my wrist, "It was a brief kiss Rose, it didn't mean anything. It felt nothing." He shakes his head in disbelief, "I just met her this morning!"

Unsure as to why he felt like he owed me an explanation, I gave him a brief smile. "You didn't have to explain that much, we are just friends."

The moment I said that, he stiffened for some reason Merlin knows what.

We start walking along the corridors leaving enough space between the both of us just in case our arms end up brushing against each other. From time to time I can see him looking at me but quickly averting his gaze once I start to notice. We walk in silence but the silence gives the both of us a sense of comfort. The feelings I have for this boy, right here, came crashing into me all at once. It is love. I've been unsure about it, trying to mostly neglect the thought, but with him right here, I'm sure. I then momentarily think of the possibility of him falling in love with me and us, unconditionally loving each other. Then I think about my unrequited love for him and how it all started. It only made sense to me over the summer but I think I've been in love with him way before that. The sense of longing for him when he's not around, the anger I feel when he's on the verge of bombing my nerves, it's different. With him, it's always different. But it wouldn't be fair; I don't want to live with an unrequited love. Call me selfish or whatever, but I'd want to find someone who'd love me back, even possibly love me more.

_I wish I knew._

_

* * *

_

**R&R! **


	8. Huit

**Disclamer: **all credits go to JK Rowling

* * *

**February 16, 2021**

I woke up to the sound of birds chirping and continuous taps on my window. I groan and push myself off the bed. That was a really good sleep and the sun is not even up yet. I lazily walk towards the window and was greeted by the most impatient owl in the world. Realizing as to whose owl it was, I eagerly slid the window open and took the letter. The owl started to peck my fingers, which only stood for one thing.

"Sorry Pudge, not today." I muttered while stroking his feathers. He flew out of the window probably heading towards the owlery for food. I sat on my bed and hastily unfolded the letter.

_Rose,_

_Are you awake? Meet me at the Astronomy Tower at 6._

I carefully fold the letter back and look at my watch only to notice that it's fifteen minutes to six. I quickly got into the shower thinking what Scorpius could possibly want this early in the Morning. And to even send an owl when he could've just—just—oh I don't know, I guess it was best to send an owl if it was this urgent. I started to feel nervous and excited and happy and kind of filled with dread, all at the same time. _Funny_, can someone actually feel all these emotions at once? Apparently for me, _yeah. _I got off the shower and wrapped myself in a towel and wiped the fog off the mirror. For a moment there I almost couldn't recognize myself. I still look a lot like my mum but the bushed curls have now turned into decent locks. The freckles that use to bother me are still there though I got use to them overtime seeing as they looked good with my fair skin. Taking a last good look at the mirror, I grabbed some Muggle clothes. Since today's our first trip to Hogsmeade, we're allowed out of our robes.

Just when I was about to sit on the bed, my eyes quickly snap back from the watch I just glanced at. Oh _shit. _The hour hand—as Muggles call it—is pointing exactly at seven. I slap my forehead and hurriedly headed out the room and eventually out of the common room. I ran my way through the empty corridors. _Ugh, _trust Scorpius to want something this early. I reached the stairs heading up the Astronomy Tower. Okay Rose, breathe. I take my time climbing up not wanting to appear like I ran to get here.

* * *

"No! No flippin way Scorpius!"

I cannot believe this is happening! I could go ballistic anytime soon. My mind started pacing back and forth thinking that maybe if I felt differently it wouldn't affect me this much. He doesn't say anything and just stands there like I'm some barmy person.

"So, let me get this straight," I began and took a deep breath. "You sent your uncontrollably fanatical owl to deliver your letter saying—no, let me rephrase that—demanding me to meet you at the crack of dawn just to—to—Ah you're such a git!" I said exasperatedly.

"Relax Rose," _and_ he speaks. "It's not like I asked you to marry me."

"What!" I exclaimed.

"Oh bugger!" he dramatically moves his right hand on his chest and holds it up in defense. "That came out wrong." He starts walking closer, "look, I stayed up the whole night thinking about it and I reckon you should give it a chance," and shrugs.

"I can't believe I ran my way up here for this!" I replied.

"I just wanted to tell you as early as possible before I changed my mind." He smirks. _The audacity! _Oh if I could just hex him right now. And he literally did it as _early_ as possible.

Shaking my head in disbelief, I try to absorb the situation. Forget that I just admitted to myself that I'm in love with him. There is no way in hell that's happening right now. I mean, out of all the people, why him? Someone _please_ Avada me right, now.

"It's just a date Rose," he's now sitting on a platform near the staircase. "I was even appalled to why he even chose some nutcase like _you._"

_Me? A nutcase? _And there was definitely something offending as to how he said _you_. "What's that suppose to mean _Malfoy_?" Yes, I am currently referring to him as Malfoy.

He stiffened and I wonder if it hurt not calling him Scorpius. Ever since second year, we've accustomed to calling each other by our first names. It made us feel closer to each other. Whether we argued or not made no difference. _Except_, right at this moment. He practically sold me!

"I didn't mean it that way," he frowns. "Look _Rose_, if you don't want to go then don't. I'm not going to force you." He actually sounded sympathetic. Talk about being bipolar.

I lightly fold my arms in front of me. "Good, cause there's nothing you can do to convince me otherwise."

"Yes, and since I practically saved your life last summer," he states dramatically, "which shows how I deeply care about you, I'll completely understand if you can't do this one thing for me."

I open my mouth and let a gasp in disbelief. I don't even think twice before I change my mind. "Fine! Fine! I'll go to Hogsmeade with Bryan," who I've never shared more than two words with.

He punches the air in triumph and flashes me that smirk. Of course, he had to bring that situation up again. Does he expect me to owe him for the rest of my life? It was last summer when it all happened. He spent a whole day over the Potter's house and I was there as well along with the rest of my family. James offered to play Quidditch and I played as Beater. I was virtually born to be a Beater even though I don't plan on trying out for Ravenclaw's Quidditch team anytime soon. All those bundled up frustrations deep, deep down lash themselves out when I hit a buldger. The game started fair and square. James, Scorpius, Hugo, Uncle George, Uncle Harry and Dad played against my team which consisted of Albus, Aunt Ginny, Louis, Teddy and Fred. Aunt Ginny and I were Beaters and it felt great—playing with a former Holyhead Harpies was amazing.

There was that time though, the moment when I thought I would probably spend an eternity at St. Mungo's. I aimed the buldger at Scorpius, only to catch a glimpse of a buldger being aimed at me at the same time. I remember screaming foul and seeing Scorpius. When I woke up I found my arm castrated. I remember hearing from Louis, "Blimey Rose, if it weren't for that Malfoy you would've broken both your arms and your legs and your neck." Apparently Scorpius dived in time before the buldger managed to hit me. The pressure from the dive however was too sudden and we fell on the ground. Unfortunately, it was him on top of me which explained my broken arm. He kept winding up about it once we got back to school.

Scorpius spun on his wheels and turned away. Just as he was about to walk out he turned his head. "Rose…"

I gave him a reassuring smile but frowned right away. "I'm still mad, Scorpius." It wouldn't feel right to go back to how we use to loathsomely call each other. He turned around and I swear I saw that smirk of his turn into some infrequent smile. I watched him walk away and I wanted to launch myself forward and grab him, tell him I love him. I love him and I think I've had since the first moment we locked eyes. And even though I know now for a fact that he doesn't feel the same way—I mean, it explains why he agreed to make that deal with Bryan.

I made my way down the stairs and was greeted by a seventh year, or half. _Ouch_. Ooh, that one must've hurt. I stand in front of the seventh year who, from the looks of it, would probably fail his apparition test.

The moment he saw me, he quickly said, "this is really difficult."

I walked closer when he managed to get his feet back. "Blimey, that must've hurt."

"Tell me about it," he replied, "I've been practicing the entire morning."

"Don't all seventh years have to practice together?" I asked.

He raised a meticulous brow and asked dumbfounded, "Why's that?" I just stare at him and comprehension dawns his face. "Oh, right!"

"Yeah, I was wondering about that while watching you." I explained, "I mean, I've read Hogwarts and History and know for a fact that no one can apparate inside and out of Hogwart's grounds."

"Clever girl," he smiles. "Tell me your name before I decide to tell you as to how I was able to apparate," _well, you didn't exactly apparate, _I say to myself.

"Why? What's your name?" I asked instead feeling shy as to why he'd want to know my name.

"Lexus, Lexus Bletchley." He pulls his hand out for me to shake it.

A little hesitant, I took his hand and shook it, "Rose Weasley."

His face brightens, "Merlin's beard! Are you _The_ Rose Weasley?"

Of course I am. I'm probably the only Weasley whose name starts with Rose in the Wizarding World. "Uhm," my eyes widen in bewilderment, "what do you mean _the_ Rose Weasley?"

"You're the girl Bryan's been talking about all summer!" he exclaims.

I stiffen. Bletchley, Lexus Bletchley. His last name did sound awfully familiar. I started to rub my chin when comprehension dawned on me. I snapped my fingers in the air and let an exasperated gasp. "You're Bryan's brother!"

He nods brightly and started clapping. "This is exciting! He's the one who has a crush on you but I actually got to touch you!"

_Ha. Funny you mentioned that._ I was about to say something else when my stomach started grumbling. I haven't had breakfast yet. I should probably head on to the Great Hall.

"Well, I have to go." I said. I gave him a forceful smile and turned around. Pity, I would've actually held on to the conversation but I didn't want to remember the fight I had earlier with Scorpius. I started to walk away and just when I was about to turn into a corner I heard someone shout. I turned around to where the voice came from.

"Wait!" Its Bryan's brother pacing forward, "I asked McGonagall for permission."

"What?"

"I asked for permission, that's why I was able to apparate." He looks out at the sun, "The spell should probably work back again by now."

"Oh, well good luck with that." I flash him a smirk. "You do need a little more practice."

He starts to laugh and I can't help but to laugh along with him. "Give my brother a chance, will you?"

My laughter started to slow down and I gave him an assuring nod.

* * *

As we make our way towards the gathering third years, I give Albus a large pinch on the arm. He winces and I glare. "You could have warned me."

He gives me a convincing look and speaks, "We really thought Scorpius would win."

"But to use me as a bargain?" I clench my teeth, "that was way out of line. Now I have to go out on a date with some guy I barely know!" I convinced myself this morning that I should probably give it a try but as our trip to Hogsmeade neared I couldn't help but to panick.

"How can you not know him? He's a Slytherin. He's been in every Potions class with you, not to mention also Defense Against the Dark Arts, Care of Ma—"

"I said _barely _Albus" I interrupt.

He holds his hand up in defense, "Look, we didn't use you as a bargain, that Bryan bloke did." He starts explaining, "We betted that if we won, he'd give us his box of Wildfire whiz-bangs, he betted that if he won, we'd convince you to go on a date with him."

"You'd trade me for a box of Wildfire whiz-bangs?" I asked exasperatedly. I started slapping his arm, harder and harder with each step we took.

He grabs his wand and points it at me. "Quit it, will you!"

I stop slapping him and scornfully shudder. "Ooh, I quiver with fear."

We reach the crowd just in time when I see Scorpius and Felix walking towards our direction.

"Oh look! Isn't that Scorpius and Felix?" He over excitingly waves a hand and motions his _boys_ to hurry. For a moment there, I could have sworn I heard him squeak like a girl.

Scorpius whispers something to Felix who in return plasters a mocking grin across his face. Am I missing something? When they're standing in front of us, Felix steps forward.

"Hey mate, you ready?" says Felix, sounding a little too excited.

"Why are you excited?_" _Scorpius asked. "You've seen Hogsmeade before."

"Scorpius, you don't understand." Felix replies, and I can tell by his tone that he's trying to suppress his laughter. "What I mean is, I've never been to Hogsmeade with just the three of you." He says matter-of-factly.

Albus interferes, "Me neither."

Scorpius cocks and eyebrow, "the _three_ of us?" he asks, "who's the _third_ one?" and puts his hands behind him.

Felix heaves a dramatic gasp, "Well, Rose of course! Who else Scorpius?" Oh bloody hell, I can already see where this is going.

"Rose?" both Albus and Scorpius chorally ask in unison.

"Oh, I completely forgot!" Felix utters, "She has to go on a date with that Bryan Bletchley," and fakes a pout.

I shoot glares at the three of them when they seem to not notice my presence. That's why Muggles call it _backstabbing_. You're suppose to talk about someone _behind_ their backs. These Slytherin idiots.

Albus starts patting Scorpius' shoulder, "bad luck mate," he sighs. "And you tried so hard to win that game." _Of exploding snaps!_ They lose and I'm the one who suffers the consequences.

"I know," Scorpius frowns, "I tried. Didn't want _Rose_ going on a date with some stranger."He almost sounded convincing but then again, this is Scorpius, an obnoxiously, apathetic, egotist, manipulative git we're talking about. He was probably just trying to win that box of Wildfire whiz-bangs.

"Don't be too hard on yourself Scorpius," Felix shakes his head, "we knew you didn't _care_ about that box of Wildfire whiz-bangs. You were purely thinking about Rose."

Albus flashes a mocking smile and nods continuously. _Oh for Merlin's sakes!_ I'm in Ravenclaw. I'm not a bloody idiot. Did they actually expect an outcome of me falling for this act of theirs?

"Will you three quit it?" I scorn, "you cannot act even if you're lives depended on it." I point a finger at Felix, "_you'd_ probably be the first one to die."

Felix's mouth opens into a wide 'O' and just when I was about to add something else I saw someone approach. All eyes were suddenly turned on him as he stood in front me. He flickers a bashful smile. _Awkward._

"Hi Rose," Bryan shyly greets.

"Hi...uh, Bryan," I greet back smiling.

Albus and Felix clear their throats and I flash them a brief glare. I give them a d_on't-you-dare-say-anything-stupid _look. I turn to look at Scorpius who seemed to have fallen silent ever since Bryan's arrival. He catches my eye and holds my gaze. My heart starts to wallop and I take a deep breath. At that moment I thought to myself: If I had a perfect life and lived in a perfect world, I'd spend every living moment staring at Scorpius. If I met him in another time, as a different person, as a Muggle, or as an old woman, I'd wish to feel the same way I feel now. I mean, how can one person have this much effect on you?

My ecstasy broke when all eyes suddenly turned to the same direction. A voice spoke, "no one's permitted to exceed the time limit at Hogsmeade. Anyone caught doing so will receive House points deductions," said Professor McGonagall, "off you go."

I turned to look at Bryan, "Well, we should get going." When he doesn't reply I take the lead to start walking.

"Wait," he took a step in front of me, "I should do this the right way." He takes a deep breath, "would you like to go to Hogsmeade with me?"

"Well what do you think I'm doing here with you?" I snap. He stiffens and I chuckle a bit. "Yes, now that you've asked." This might actually turn out to be a pretty good day after all.

* * *

"Where should we go first?" I asked him, when we stood in the massive entrance of Hogsmeade.

"I'd like to show you—" Bryan began, then chuckles a bit. "I mean, I'm sure you've seen it before. But I've always wanted to see it with someone. You want to go there first?"

"Yes." I didn't even bother to ask where we were going because at that moment, all my worries were gone. I felt safe with him. I felt safe with this guy I have now recently able to share more than two words. Bryan took my arm, awkwardly at first but relaxed a bit as we started walking. Arm in arm, we passed several stores. We reached Three Broomsticks and for a moment I thought he would take me there, but we walked passed it. I could have sworn I saw Scorpius through the window. Shaking the thought away, we kept walking. We turned left to another corner, walked through a large wooden doorway, and there we were standing in one of those abandoned cabins. The roof was gone and the windows were cracked.

I turned to look at Bryan. "I would like to say that it's beautiful and all but—"

"Look over there," he pointed out the window. At first all I could see were trees, and a small pond covered with lilies. Bryan noticed my expression and urged me to look farther. I walked closer to the window and there it was. From afar they look like purple stars flying around but when you look closer you can actually see them.

"Cornish pixies?" I laughed self-deprecatingly.

"Yes, I know," said Bryan, "they're unlikable to look at up close but when you see them from a good distance, they're quite a fun thing to watch." I actually would have to agree with that. Little annoying Cornish pixies flying around looking like stars. That's something you don't see every day

We continued to watch the pixies fly around probably messing up anything that moves. "Beauty, huh" I edged at Bryan.

"Yeah, beautiful…" he uttered. From the corner of my eye, I could have sworn I saw him staring at me.

I blinked and gave him a bashful smile, "So how did you come about this place?"

He averted his gaze and said, "You mean this cabin? My parents brought me to Hogsmeade for the first time when I was six. Lexus and I were running around and I got lost. I kept walking, turning from corner to corner of every store and ended up here." He smiled, "I've never showed this place to anyone, afraid word would go around about some free Cornish pixies around Hogsmeade."

I laughed blithely, "yes and you wouldn't want your babies locked in cages," I jokingly uttered.

He looked at me and smiled again. We walked around the roofless cabin observing the spectacular views you could see through every broken window. He started asking me questions that took me no less than a sentence to answer. When I finished, he began to talk about his life, his childhood and his dreams. There was something about him and the way he smiled. It was like meeting someone out of your dreams or a beloved character from a fairytale book. He seemed so nice and caring all at the same time. For a moment, I tried to imagine how it would feel like being with each other every day. After a while, it seemed that we both knew that it was time to leave.

"I'll walk you back to Hogwarts," Bryan said.

As the afternoon neared dusk, the air got cooler and the sky grew darker. We walked back going the opposite directions we took to get here. When we reached Hogwarts, he stopped in front of me.

"Now's probably the time to thank you," he smiled kindly, "it was probably not the kind of date you expected, but—"

"No, I should thank you," I said. "I had a wonderful day," and smiled. I was dying to say something else but the silence was already too awkward. He reached out his hand and we exchanged a polite handshake. He held on to my hand a little longer and walked away.

I started to pace down the corridors eager to get some good night sleep. This day was definitely something worth telling Lily about tomorrow. When I arrive at the common room, to my surprise, Albus and Felix were sitting on the sofa waiting. What surprised me the most was Scorpius standing near the portrait door. "How did you get in?" I asked.

"Scorpius knows the password." Albus blurted.

"How do you know the password?" I turned back at Scorpius and he just shrugs. He actually looked a bit troubled, like how your dad looks at you when you arrive home late at night.

Albus intentionally coughed breaking the silence. "So how did your date go? Anything worth telling us?"

"No. I'm still angry at what happened earlier," I said then walked out.

"Oh come on Rose," Scorpius grabs my wrist and I stop. "We were just trying to make you feel better."

"So you can feel less guilty, you mean?" I state as-a-matter-of-fact.

"Of course not!" Felix adds, "what gave us away anyway? I sure rehearsed."

I paused for a bit thinking of the perfect answer. "Well one," I show a finger, "aside from the fact that you sounded awfully scripted, I've never heard you guys mention each other's names so often in a conversation. Two," I show another finger, "the tone of Albus' voice changed. It got squeaky."

Felix laughs at my remark and shots Albus a look, "yeah mate, you sounded like a real girl."

"I'm not finished." I snap. And they fix their eyes back at me. I add another finger to the previous two I've already shown. "Three, Scorpius' fingers fidget whenever he's nervous or up to something. Usually something wrong," which is quite ironic for someone whose expressions mostly consists of I-don't-give-a-damn most of the time. I looked at Scorpius and he's standing firmly. I avert my eyes but I know he's still staring.

"I didn't know that," Albus speaks.

"Didn't know what?" I ask.

"That thing about Scorpius' fingers," he replies.

"Me neither," Felix adds, "I never noticed it actually."

For a brief moment I felt self- attained. Was I the only one who knew about this? I mean, first it's his fingers that fidget then his whole hand gives it away. I noticed this incident last summer when mum asked him if he was in love with someone already. It was quite odd for Hermoine Weasley to randomly come out of nowhere and interrogate Scorpius. The entire time his hands were behind him, that's when I noticed,

_and that's when I knew._

_

* * *

_**R&R! x**


	9. Neuf

**Disclaimer:** all credits go to JK Rowling

* * *

**December 25, 2021 **

I had a faint sense that it was morning and that I was waking up, and that something about my life had changed dramatically. Then I remembered Rose, and my eyes opened wide. That happened months ago. Tell me I'm not going to wake up every morning being reminded of it.

I got out of bed and I took a shower, letting it run colder than usual. The cold was invigorating, and I felt so alive, skin tingling, blood pumping. I dried off, got dressed and hastily put my Slytherin tie on. I stared at myself in the mirror, feeling like some pathetic loser who shoved the girl he loved right into the arms of someone else. Hearing a bang from the door I turned around and saw an irritated Felix Zabini walking in.

"Why so grouchy in the morning?" I asked.

"This is mad," he looks at me incredulously. "We'll be the only ones around here without a date." Then it hit me, the Yule Ball's tonight.

"What about Albus?"

"Oh, him," he rolls his eyes, "he asked one of the Goyle sisters." I'd ask which one, but they all look alike.

"No worries mate, I'm sure you'll find someone," I said trying to find some words of consolation.

"Well of course you're not worried," he sneered, "girls are dying to be asked out by you and you're just standing there thinking of _Rose_."

Startled, I rhetorically ask, "where did that come from?"

"Mate, you've been avoiding her for ten months now." He replies sympathetically. He gives me that look of concern him and Albus have been giving me whenever her name would magically pop out of the conversation.

"You're wrong," I state as a-matter-of-fact.

A small smirk starts to form his face and started heading towards the door. He opened it and just as he was about to go out, he looked back at me and said, "whatever helps you sleep at night mate, but one of these days you're going to wake up wishing you were in Bletchey's shoes."

I stiffened and watched him leave.

_Well,_

Would you rather Avada me right now?

Ironically, those days do happen. You know what it's like? _Getting up?_ Feeling hopeless, feeling like the girl you're in love with is _kissing_ and holding hands with another man. I remember that morning, the day after she and Bletchley went on a date to Hogsmeade, the date I now hold the blame for, and I overheard her talking to Lily in the library. I feel sick just thinking about it, and if I could, relive that day again, I'd wish to have not been there.

* * *

_I was walking around the library hoping to find some book about Giants. We had this useless essay for Care of Magical Creatures, a waste of time subject to begin with. I would've skipped that class from now and then if it wasn't for Hagrid. I owe that chap a big lot. There was that time when he caught me, Felix and Albus sneaking off to the forest, hoping to see some centaurs. The one we saw had a nasty temper and went nuts when Felix took out his wand. Fortunately, Hagrid got there just in time and talked the centaur out of it. _

_Shaking the thought away, I started looking through every shelf. When I finally found a seemingly large book, I spotted Rose talking to someone on the other side. Curious, I leaned closer. _

"_Lily, stop it!" I heard her whisper. _

"_Oh, I can't believe this! Imagine the look on their faces, especially Scorpius' when –"_

"_Hush Lily!" _

_It took all of my willpower to walk to other side. Lily saw me first and perched wide-eyed. Something about her face gave it away that their previous conversation was something I did not want to hear. _

"_When what?" I persisted and walked closer._

_Rose turned around. Her blue eyes went huge, "n-n, uh, nothing," she muttered._

_Lily stood beside her and I could see she was eager to tell me. "Just tell him Rose, no big deal."_

_I looked back at Rose and waited, "Well?"_

"_Hey, what's going on?" We all looked to where the voice came from. It was Albus carrying a drink. _

"_Rose, here," I respond matter-of-factly, "has something to say."_

_We all look back at Rose and I hear her sigh heavily, "Not that it's any of both of your business, but Bryan has asked me to be his girlfriend," she pauses for a while. No. No. Fuck. Stop talking._

_Crucio me instead, _

_This is not happening. _

"_And, seeing as we had a really good time yesterday, I said yes." She continued. _

_Albus nearly choked on his drink. "What?"_

_And I just stood there, speechless._

_

* * *

_

I ran my way to the Great Hall, trying to forget the memory of it. My heart felt as if it might blow apart. I'd only feel this tightness in my chest whenever I'd see her, blue eyes, red hair, pale skin, brown freckles. But now it was pretty extreme, with or without her presence. _I shouldn't have made that bet with Bletchley, _I should've stopped her, I should've, I should've just—nevermind, I've gone mental. My parents should probably send me to St. Mungo's.

Forcing my mind away from the image of Rose, I bury my face in frustration and stopped running, not wanting to burst through the Great Hall. When I reached the entrance, I already spotted Albus and Felix sitting across each other. Well, actually, there's some Gryffindor girl sitting beside Felix whose back I couldn't quite recognize. Albus snapped his head up and turned towards my direction. He must've sensed my presence (sure, either it's normal that we're connecting in some way or we're just something like that).

The moment he saw me, his face plastered a sign of relief but turned into a sudden smug when I pointed at the girl beside Felix. I could tell he knew something and that he was eager to share the information. I sat beside Albus, looked at Felix and –

_Bloody hell_

"What she doing here?" I whispered to Albus.

"I think," He whispered back, "Felix asked her to be his date for tonight. I heard them talk about Yule Ball."

We exchanged a brief moment of concerned looks and burst out of laughter at the same time. "_Betty Vane?"_ my tone absentmindedly rising. Let me tell you something about Betty. She's in Gryffindor, _but_ a legitimate nutcase. She's an overly conceited girl whose face is too white to stuff with too much make-up. She's like a broken radio whose mouth probably closes only when asleep. Well, unless she talks in her sleep. In short, _not_ Zabini material.

"Well, hello Scorpius," she greeted with a wink and a tone that most guys would find seductively pleasant. Fortunately, most guys do not include me.

"Sod off," I replied bitterly.

She huffed and walked away. Good, get that bloody face out of here.

Felix laughed impishly, "get over it."

"He can't." intruded Albus, "she forcibly kissed him last year, remember? _In front_ of Rose."

"Yes, we know, Malfoy fancies Weasley," he replied mockingly.

"Nope," Albus interrupts. Well, thank you mate, "he's _in love_ with her," on a second thought, I take that back.

I give him a thanks-for-nothing look that he reciprocates with a smirk. I then turn to Felix with an apparent look that implied he's gone mental.

"What?" he frowned.

"When I said _someone_ I didn't mean _Betty._" I tried to reason, "you do not want to take her to the ball."

His face slowly formed a mischievous smile. "Who said I'm taking her?" I turned to Albus, who in return looked just as perplexed as I was.

"She's fixing me up with her sister," his face now forming a slight smirk, "you know, 5th year Gryffindor prefect,_ Diana_ Vane."

Albus heaves a sigh of relief, "now that's Zabini material" _and_ a total opposite of Betty may I add.

I couldn't help to notice however, Betty actually fixing Felix up with her sister. But that's something a nice person would do, and I think I've already made it clear that Betty is far from nice. Sensing that there's more to this, "in exchange for what?" I asked Felix.

His face suddenly looked uncomfortable and I did not like where this was going. "Well, you see, she didn't have a date and," he takes a sip from his cup and breathed deeply, "it accidentally slipped that you did not have one either so—"

No. No. Fucking. Way. "You're kidding."

After a brief uncomfortable silence,

He started laughing hoarsely. "Relax mate, I gave her a Confusing Concoction and got her into agreeing to introduce me to her sister."

Albus chuckles slightly, "nice," and gave a pleasing nod.

I heaved the biggest sigh of relief and started eating. Albus started talking about his plans for the ball, his date being Pricilla, tall, blonde, like the rest of the Goyle sisters. If I wasn't so uninterested in this stupid excuse for a social gathering, I would've considered taking the other sister, Libby. By the time Albus changed topic, I was just sitting there half hearing everything. Who cares about some stupid ball. Just when I was about to stand up I felt someone abruptly sit beside me. Albus stopped talking the moment he noticed (okay, we're something like that).

"Hey guys," said person whose voice I'd recognize anywhere.

Stay.

Stay you bloody git.

"Hey Rose," said Albus.

My instincts kept telling me to stay and face her. But being a pathetic loser as I am, I stood up and intended to walk away.

She grabbed my wrist and I shrugged it off. "Scorpius, what's your problem?" Her voice rising infuriatingly, "you've been rude to me since you found out Bryan and I were dating. Either that, or you act like I don't exist. You avoid me when I talk to you especially during Potions. You even begged Professor Slughorn for another partner. Am I bothering you? Have I done something wrong? Answer me!"

I walked away, not wanting to discuss this. I knew she was watching me walk away hoping I'll look back and make it all better for her and I can't do that. I can't make it all better.

* * *

I stared at my closet feeling like an Auror flying off to war, determined and with high hopes. There must be something I could wear for tonight. I can't believe I forgot to write to mum that Yule Ball was tonight. I started pawing through my school robes, until I spotted a sapphire gown. This should do, wondering where it came from, I yanked it out and put it aside. I looked at my watch—I had less than thirty-minutes to do a complete make-over. Frustrated, I just stared at myself in the mirror trying to find what I could do with my hair. Just as I was about to get started, I heard someone open the door. I turned around and to my biggest relief, saw Lily.

"Lily!" I greeted her with all the apparent gladness in the world. "Do you know how to put on make-up?"

She looked slightly taken aback and dramatically put her hand on her chest. "Of course, silly. Who do you think I am?"

_Let's see._

Too young for your own good?

She started putting on some foundation on my face, which according to her, would guarantee my skin a perfect, porcelain look. Next were the mascara, eyeliner and lipstick. Blimey, all these Muggle accessories. How they come up with it, I guess I'll die not knowing. After make-up I took the sapphire gown and put it on. I smiled at myself, I'm such a _Ravenclaw_. It flowed down perfectly and it felt soft against my skin. I heard Lily breathlessly say 'wow'. When I looked at her she took out her wand and –

"What are you doing?" I stopped her.

"Relax Rose," she replied convincingly, "I learned this spell to make your hair look tidied up." She then flicked her wand and it felt like the wind blew around the room. I looked at the mirror, my curls were fluffed up. I don't know whether it looked good or bad, but it looked different…and modern…and not like Plain Rose.

Suddenly my mind flashed back to when Louis and I were inseparable. "You're pretty Rose, you just need to loosen up a bit." I sighed, missing my so called _bestfriend_. If I knew Louis getting in a relationship meant _Hello_ girlfriend and _Goodbye_ bestfriend, I would've hexed Haley, if she wasn't so nice and all. I mean, that schedule of theirs didn't even work. But enough about minding someone else's relationship. I should start thinking about mine. Funny, _my _relationship, or at least that's what people would call what Bryan and I are into. I mean, he's so nice, how can someone ever turn a nice guy down? And may I add, a nice _Slytherin_. Couples don't give birth to a nice child and say '_he's such a Slytherin'_.

But for me, when you talk about a relationship, shouldn't it be with someone you _love_? And isn't love someone you wouldn't want to live without. Someone you fall head over heels for, someone you can love like crazy, and will love you the same way back. Someone who makes your heart beat fast and slow at the same time. And it pains me because it's not Bryan whom I feel these things with. But what pains me more is knowing I can't be with _him _and instead I go with a two-second rebound. I'm a despicable individual; no guy should fall in love with me.

"Rose!" Lily suddenly shouts, snapping me out of my reverie. "_Hello?_" when I just look at her she starts pointing at her watch. Oh crap! Bryan's probably already waiting for me in front of the Great Hall. I hurried off the door not bothering to look at the full length mirror. Though, I did hear Lily shout "you look gorgeous Rose!" which already gave me the boost I needed.

I could already hear the orchestra playing waltzes inside the Great Hall as I descended down the grand staircase. I scanned the crowd, a bunch of girls giggling to one side and boys on the other, probably waiting for their dates. I carefully hold on to my dress, hoping not to fall seeing as these heels are killing me. As I reached the last step, my foot suddenly shook and before I knew it there was nothing for me to hold on to for balance, I screamed and just when I thought I was about to fall someone took my arm and swung me up. All eyes were suddenly focused on me and my hero. I looked up expecting to see Bryan.

But then again,

When does anything I expect ever happen?

In his dress robes, Scorpius still looked like those aristocratic snobs you see in Muggle movies, except better and the kind that your imagination could only create. His hair was polished back, which showed off his metallic gray eyes. Everything about him just looked perfect. I was about to say how "he looks nice" before I realized that he hasn't even said a word yet.

* * *

For a long time, all I could do was stare at her. In the extended silence, I heard a convoy of giggling girls pass us by. That behavior should be outlawed, you never know what they're thinking. Ignoring them, I focus back on Rose who apparently has also managed to turn mute. Looking at her, all I could think of is how beautiful she looks—her hair framing her face, flawlessly making her blue eyes stand out, the sapphire gown emphasizing the curve her body has developed. I probably should say something considering that fight we just had earlier. But I wasn't sure where to begin with and I was starting to consider walking away and leave her here when she began to smile.

_Kill me_. I begged silently.

"You look nice," she said. I was about to say something in return when I saw someone approach.

"There you are," he said to Rose, then turned to me, "mind if I take her from here?" Bloody son of a—he took her arm and I watched as they walked towards the entrance holding hands.

Rose looked back and I slid my gaze away from her. You know when they say that when you see the person you love, time stops. And I guess it's true and you can stare at them as long as you want. What they don't tell you is that when it starts again, it moves so fast and you're scared to death that you'll never catch another glimpse of that person again.

"Hey Scorpius!" someone shouted, breaking into my reverie. I turned around to see who it was and saw Albus hand in hand with Pricilla and _Libby?_

"Hey, where's Felix?"

"He's already inside," he motioned towards the Great Hall. "Listen, can I talk to you for a sec?"

He led me away from the Goyle sisters but with enough distance so it wouldn't seem that we were ditching them. "What's Libby doing with you two?"

"Yeah about that," he said, and started rubbing his temples, "you mind taking her?"

"_What?" _I demanded.

"Come on mate," he implored, "you're hot and dateless, she's hot and dateless. Why not be hot and dateless together? Plus, you don't want to go staring at Rose the entire evening."

"You were spying on me?"

"It was kind of hard not to. We're connected in a way you know." He jokingly utters which would've made him sound like a creep if he wasn't the Albus I know.

I took Libby's arm and led her inside. Albus said something about the prefects doing a great job which I did not bother to appreciate being too self-indulgent drowning in my own misery. When we reached a table, I saw James approach us from the corner. Next to him was probably his date, who I recognize to be as Gryffindor's chaser, Georgina Spinnet.

"Well, look what we have here," he grinned, "Albie and Scorpie with the Goyle sisters. Where's Flexie?" He stated teasingly.

"Don't be rude James," said Georgina edging him.

We sat down and James leaned forward and whispered to me, "as far as I can remember, my cousin has red hair, not blonde," and pointed at Libby.

I looked at him not catching what he meant by this. Albus apparently overheard and whispered on my behalf, "_Rose_, has a boyfriend you twit." _Twit?_ Albus, stop with the girl lingo.

"Hey, a little respect for your older brother, will you." he replied before smacking Albus on the head.

During their little episode, I noticed Rose looking at our direction. "Cut it out," I insisted silencing them. "I think she's coming with him."

"Who's coming with who?" said Felix suddenly popping out of nowhere.

"Hey," greeted Rose.

"Oh, _she's_ coming," said Albus, Felix and James in unison.

"Hey," Bletchley greeted coming from the back.

"Oh, with _him,_" the three added.

Albus intentionally coughed and stood up beside Pricilla. "Would you like to dance?" he asked her with a wink which made Pricilla blush. I can already foresee it. I bet my life this_ twit's_ going to grow up womanizing.

The next thing you know every body else started leading their date towards the dance floor. Not wanting to feel as pathetic as I have the whole day, I took Libby's hand and led her to dance. We started dancing and I couldn't help but to catch glimpses of Rose. Rose's head leaning on Bletchley's shoulder. Rose smiling at something said bloke probably said.

I couldn't take it anymore. I led Libby back to the table, "will you excuse me?" and left.

You know that point of no return when you suddenly find your body being governed by your senses. When you stop giving a damn about the situation and everyone else around you. When you say to yourself, this is it, it's now or never. And it feels like instead of gravity pulling you down, it starts to pull you forward. And you're scared to where it might lead you, but the funny thing is, the things you're scared of are usually the most worthwhile. I continued to walk forward not bothering with the sudden whispers I pass by.

She seemed to have stopped dancing when she noticed me approach. I grabbed her arm away from Bletchley's shoulder, "you mind I borrow her for a while?" and dragged her away from him. Bletchley was about to launch forward when Rose whispered something to him which made him back away. I kept dragging her to the dance floor.

"Dance with me."

"_Okay._" she agreed without hesitation.

I took this as a sign to put her arms around my neck. I then dropped my arms into a loose circle around her waist. If life was going to give me this chance, I might as well make the most of it.

She looked at me and said, "Scorpius, you've been avoiding me for the past ten months and now we're dancing. What's going—"

"Don't," I interrupt, pulling her closer. "You don't do this to a person, you know?" I whispered, "you don't walk around looking breathtakingly gorgeous when you know you're not available."

* * *

**I decided to temporarily stop with "I knew, she knew".  
**

**PS. I thank those who alerted... but to those that added the story to their favorites, please review seeing as you liked it. It's not that easy to come up with a story and reviews really make up for it.**

**R&R! xxx**


	10. Dix

No more quotes for now, sorry. I started to find them quite unnecessary.

**Disclaimer: **JK Rowling, hands down

* * *

There was something about the way he held my body close to his. The way I could feel his breath brush against my cheeks as we danced, his fingers slowly rubbing against mine. I closed my eyes momentarily only aware of every beat of my heart, my mind in peace and the way my body moved perfectly against his.

"You think I look gorgeous?" I asked, a little hesitant at first.

"_Yes._"

"Just tonight?"

He took a little long to respond, "just tonight," he whispered. And even though there was something forceful about his tone and the way it almost sounded as he was saying it to himself, I felt my heart sink in an instant.

I _could_ live with that, I thought. "_Just tonight."_ If this was a dream, I hope to never wake up.

* * *

**December 26, 2021**

My first thought upon waking up was _him_, and that I needed to pack. My dad made it quite a rule that we'd go home for the holidays. I grabbed a suitcase and my clothes. While packing, I thought about how I liked to think of myself as a good person. Growing up, I've always liked to follow the rules. I kept my things organized, studied for exams, did my best to respect teachers who thought they knew better. It wasn't like last night's dance had me doubting my integrity. I hadn't had anything to do with that, mind you—that was all Scorpius, and his mood swings. That dance was innocent enough, wasn't it? Even though he's done a perfectly marvelous job avoiding me for the past ten months. And I'm sure Bryan didn't mind. But why, for crying out loud, do I feel so guilty?

My thoughts were full of questions once again, leaving me dizzy. I then suddenly hear a knock on the door.

"Come in," I said.

The door opened, and I was relieved to see who it was. "Morning Lily," I greeted her with a smile.

"Morning, oh! You're packing already?" she said while eyeing my suitcase. "But we're not leaving until later."

"And by later, don't you mean in an hour, later?" I stated.

"Sure," she replied with a shrug and sat on my bed. "So… how did the ball go? Anything exciting?" she asked, with a grin on her face while flipping her long red hair here and there. I could already tell she was fishing for something.

I thought about Scorpius, "no, nothing exciting."

"Oh come on Rose, there must be _something_," she insisted.

"Oh! There was that time when Professor Trelawney approached James. We were all eating and she started talking nonsense, saying how James will wake up in the morning with blonde hair and some other things," I shook my head, "complete rubbish, really."

Unsatisfied, she went on, "what about you? Did you dance?"

I thought about Scorpius, again. "Of course I danced, it's a _ball_ Lily." I said matter-of-factly.

"Well, who did you dance with? Don't tell me you just danced with Bryan the _whole_ evening," she replied, sounding like that would've been the most boring thing in the world.

I slowly closed my suitcase while debating whether I should tell her about it. But hiding it would make it look like I've done something wrong and that would really, just intensify the guilt. I look at her waiting impatiently, drumming the bed with her fingers. Brilliant, just what I needed—an immature, nosy, nagging of a cousin.

_Fine_.

"I danced with Scorpius as well," I said quickly.

The moment I said his name, her big green eyes lit up and her jaw dropped. "_You're kidding_," she said excitedly.

"No," I replied, "why do you seem surprised? And just so you know, we're friends." I said clearly, over pronouncing the word _friends_.

"Whatever," she shrugged, "I guess I must have been fooled by the way you keep staring at him _and_ the fact that you had a _crush_ on him."

"I don't stare at him," I blunted, sounding completely defensive while ignoring the crush part.

"Oh, don't be so touchy. After all, he stares at you too."

"No he doesn't," I insisted, even though deep down I know he does. "Lily, where is this all coming from?"

"From everyone?" she says like I'm the most oblivious person in the world. "I mean, we all notice it, _especially_ when he stays over at our house for the holidays and you just so happen to be there as well."

Flashes of moments whenever we'd spend summer over the Potter's started popping out of my head. "Whatever, it doesn't matter anyway."

"Since you have a—quote on quote—boyfriend, right?"

I ignored her comment about the quote on quote part, and the fact that I'm starting to feel really guilty. "Right. But even if I didn't have a boyfriend, it still wouldn't matter." I convincingly say to her, well, _mainly_ to myself.

"Sure," replied Lily, with an evident hint that she was not convinced. "Well, I should probably head back. I still got some packing to do." She spun on her wheels and I accompanied her towards the common room.

I sat on the couch as I watched her open the door. I was about to avert my gaze when I noticed someone at the door, other than Lily. I stood up immediately as soon as I recognized Bryan. I could still see Lily waiting at the door, probably planning on eavesdropping. I gave her the look saying that now was not the time.

"I'll leave you two then," she nodded apprehensively, "Have fun!"

"See you Lily," I managed to say quickly, sending her away. I forced myself to look at Bryan as soon as Lily disappeared. "How long have you been there?" I asked.

"Not long."

"I see."

For a moment, there was that awkward silence and I could see Bryan's eyes wander from me and the window and back to me then the window.

"Bryan, list—"

"It's snowing, let's take a walk before you go."

* * *

By the time we got outside, it already stopped snowing. We then decided to just sit on one of those wooden benches alongside Hogwarts. I could already see plenty of students making their way to the station. I'm glad I brought my suitcase, who knows how long we'd be sitting here before one of us decides to speak.

"You're staying?" I asked, breaking the tension and the fact that I noticed he didn't bring anything with him.

"Yeah, my parents went to Paris for their anniversary and Lexus' off to Kingston University for Wizards."

I didn't respond for a moment, thinking I should just say it now before something else happens. Then when that something else happens, things might get worse, and when things get worse, chances are more tossing and turning at night. And I can't have that anymore. I need something convenient, I need to have a life with no problems, and if no problems meant zero relationship, then what the hell. Why not? If love was the mischief-maker, causing all this chaos, I'd gladly get rid of it.

"Look, last night," I finally managed to speak, taking deep breaths in between, "I don't know what happened. And it was an innocent dance, believe me. But ever since waking up this morning, I couldn't imagine looking at you without feeling guilty, and now I'm not sure what's going to happen to us. Because Bryan, I liked us, you and I, it worked, it—"

"You often stare, have you noticed that?"

"What?"

"I've," he began, cutting me off. "I've tried to ignore it, the staring. But ever since Yule Ball with the dancing, and the stolen looks… Well I noticed it, and I can't un-notice it. And it bloody sucks, because I'm here, madly in love with you while you're in love with someone else."

At those words I felt like a bundle of ice cold water was splashed on my face. I once read this book, _Mansfield Park,_ where the protagonist was caught between a man who loved her desperately and the man she desperately loved. And of course, it got predictable who she was going to end up with. I use to think that such choice took a no brainer. I know I should probably say something close to an epiphany, but all I can think of is how I couldn't have been happier to not have to make such choice. I sigh. I'm an awful person. No one should really fall in love with me.

"I'm sorry," was all I could say.

He took a deep breath, "me too."

We just sat there for a long time, until it was already time for me to leave. I stood up and I was finally able to look at him. He stood up and we looked at each other for a while until he extended his arm.

What? "You want to shake hands?" I asked, uncertain.

He managed to give a slight shrug. "I figured we should end this the way it started."

And with that said, we shook hands and we let go. As I walked my way to the station, it started to snow again. I smiled to myself. I love it when it snows. Everything's magical, everything looks pretty. The clothes are great, coats, scarves, gloves, hats. The world changes when it snows. It's quiet and everything softens.

"It's snowing."

I tilted my head, thinking I was probably imagining hearing _his_ voice. I quickly turned around, wanting to snap out of my hallucination. But then again, when did I ever hallucinate. "Did you make a wish?" I asked.

He made a face, then chuckled arrogantly. "You still do that?"

I didn't answer, letting the question hang for a bit. I then realized snowflakes starting to stay on my lashes, and when I would rub it off, they'd stay on my nose.

"You've got—" Scorpius said pointing at his nose.

I laughed. "Yeah, they always seem to stick on my face." His face showed the same expression-less emotion, and when our eyes met, I just had to say it. "Why did you avoid me for ten months? Have I done something wrong to upset you? Cause if I had, then I'm sorry and I probably didn't mean to. But you can't just avoid me when you don't have the guts to talk about it. And-and you expect me to act like nothing happened when you suddenly appear out of nowhere? I mean, we're friends, aren't we?"

"Yeah, we're friends."

"And as far as I'm concerned, when a friend upsets a friend they talk about it."

"I guess so."

"What? I _guess_ so?" I drew a shaky breath. I was beginning to get angry. This was so typical of Scorpius. "You're limited to two or three words now? What happened to Mr. I'm So Great I Can Crucio You."

He raised his eyebrows. "When did I say that?"

"Does it matter!" I cried, and I found myself shaking furiously. "The thing is, you can't just avoid me for a very long time and you suddenly say things that make it impossible for me to hate you. Because I hate you, did you know that? You get on my nerves ninety-nine percent of the time. And you get these terrible mood swings, one day you're nice to me and the next thing you know you go back to being the obnoxious git you are. You say we can be friends, but really? When have you ever treated me like one."

He didn't say anything for a moment. "Are you finished now?"

"Yes."

"Can I say something?"

"Yes."

"First," he began, then took a deep breath. It looked like he wanted to desperately say something, but would change his mind right away. Then he started to rub his temples, "honestly Rose you know I'm no good at this. I just-I guess as a _friend_, I didn't want my friend spending all her time with some bloke I didn't like."

"What? You avoided me because you didn't like Bryan?"

"That and among other things."

"Other things, preferably, the fact that he beat you at exploding snaps?"

He hesitated, and looked as if he was considering the idea. "Yeah, that. I don't like him because I should've won that game." He said, sounding more like he was convincing himself instead.

"I can't believe this," I said, shaking my head, "you're the most horrible person in the world!"

"Well you can say that since I'm sure you've met every living individual," he said with a smirk.

The next thing you know, I just gave up and I softened a bit. Arguing meant we'd be back to how we were, and frankly, it was either that or nothing. He must have been thinking the same thing for he moved a bit closer.

"So, you want to go see James' blonde hair?" he suggested.

"You're kidding!" I said with a gasp.

He laughed. "Not at all. I saw him this morning, quite a look actually."

We walked together, on our way to Hogwarts Express. We spotted Albus, Felix, Lily and Hugo waiting in line. Each of them plastered a grin on their faces the moment they saw us approach.

"Hey, where's James?" I asked excitedly.

"Oh, you heard about the blonde hair? He's already inside, hiding." Albus said, laughing at the same time.

"I reckon Scorpius told you?" inserted Lily.

"Yeah," I said with a nod and gave her the look that implied 'stop whatever you're thinking'. "Well, what happened?"

"Hilarious really," she started laughing, "he said he just woke up with blonde hair, apparently one of his roommates used the Colour-Change Charm on an object, but missed and it hit him instead. The spell doesn't wear off after a month."

We all laughed, thinking of ways that would make James remember this for the rest of his life. I bet all of us were also thinking about how Professor Trelawney predicted all of this. I wonder if I could ask her who I'm going to marry. I laughed at myself, that's probably not a good idea. We kept moving forward when another snowflake fell on my nose. I stopped for a brief moment, thinking I haven't made my wish yet. I rubbed the snow off.

_If there is someone out there for me, I wish for a sign that when we meet, we're going to stay happy together, forever_.

"Hey, let's go in." Scorpius suddenly said breaking my thoughts.

I smiled, probably the biggest one I've manage to show in the past months. "Yeah, let's go."

* * *

**Sorry, it looks a bit rushed. But I had to update in a week.**

**R&R! xxx**


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